Happy Halloween!

My son came down in a football jersey and I asked if it was football day at work.  Oops - yep, Halloween.  Brain-before-coffee comment.

I took a Benadryl last night (2 actually) and FINALLY feel like I slept.  Life feels brighter  - picture me skipping through a field of flowers.  What does that mean??  Bitch fest is over (at least for today).

PHB call last night and I actually enjoyed it again.  We read our homework, but it was more conversational.  The HW was about WHY NOW for this health push.  Holly started off by reading something from Brooke Castillo about it NEVER being too late to start.  Before each class I open a Little Miracles card for some inspiration.  Last night's was spot on - thanks Gracie Allen.

My Accountability Partner for PHB invited me to a conference in June.  Women speakers, inspiration, motivation ... the usual stuff.  In the name of 'yes,' I'm going.  I was flattered that she asked me (she mentioned at one point, not wanting to meet PHB people in person - too strange with everything we share), but then asked me.  The keynote speaker is the author I'm not into that much (Girl, Wash Your Face -- Rachel Hollis).  I was on the fence, leaning to 'no,' but I remembered my lesson on being engaged, saying YES and stepping out of the box.  This is a big step.  I agree with Darcie that meeting in person is an entirely different animal and kind of nerve-racking, but CONNECTION.  (I was also having a hard time with YES because of low energy, etc ... couldn't muster the effort.)   We don't have the tickets yet, so who knows what's going to happen.  They go on sale Monday.

Didn't go to yoga yesterday because my old man was sick and I had to take him to the vet.  A 100 lb dog with uncontrollable diarrhea is an EMERGENCY hahahaha.  He's on the mend and I'm able to share some of his probiotics with Aspen so she had a better results this morning too.  Is it strange to set my INTENTION today for solid poops?!?!?

I was going to skip boxing this morning since I can't go for the next few weeks, but changed my mind.  I'm going (barring dog issues).  Doing what I can, TODAY.  I'll figure out the rest as it comes.

I have exercise restrictions for 3 weeks - 21 days.  I'm doing the 21 day meditation (timing is a little off, but close enough).  I also saw Gretchen Rubin had a 21 day program for changing a habit.  I ordered it from her website and I thought it was a little book (only a couple of dollars).  It's emails for 21 days - no book.  Oh well, I'm giving that a go too.  Looking for ways to have an excellent 21 day learning experience instead of a lousy 21 day experience.

And, as luck would have it, this week in PHB it's about upping your exercise.  OMG.  Seriously?  I messaged my coach.  There MUST be a lesson in this for me.  She modified my homework and asked me to find the lesson.  Ummm, that's what I asked first!!  JK - it's a good idea.

I seem to be in a rotten (and apparently, dramatic) little streak lately and it feels like so many steps backwards - back to the beginning.  What is helping me turn that around is making a list of what IS working.  Testing to see if "nothing's working" is true.  It's not true.  See a list in black & white has been helpful.

I thought of something to add to my Book of Life Experiences (still don't know what it's called - maybe I need to think of my own title).  Then promptly FORGOT it!!  I still can't remember what is was -- story of my life hahahaha!!!  It makes me laugh that I can't remember.  Maybe it wasn't worthy of the book after all.

UPDATE:  I went back to find the podcast to see what Gretchen calls this book - Personal Timeline.  She calls the finance/household piece - The Facts of Life.  I remembered that she mentioned a reader uses The Facts of Life name for her Personal Timeline.  I'm using the name, The Facts of Life -- much better.  It can be a 2-parter.  One is the personal book, the other is the important paperwork of the household. Problem solved (but now I'm singing The Facts of Life theme song).

Happy Halloween!  I plan to take some pictures tonight (we have to post on the PHB network as part of JOINING in the fun).  We have a pretty large bunch of peeps coming over, so it might be hard to remember.  Later gators!

5 Things

Let's get the 5 things out of the way.

(1)  Aspen became Cujo with potty training - attacked and chased me.  Bit both me and my hubby.  True story.  Potty training on hold.  Funny, but not funny.

(2)  Doggie diarrhea.  Enough said.

(3)  Coughing ALL NIGHT LONG last night.  So much that hubby left the building.

(4)  My biopsy came back positive (not surprised).  I need to have the full procedure to remove it.  It has to happen within a certain number of days from the original biopsy because my insurance hates me.  Friday morning.  No exercise for a week; no boxing/yoga/lifting for 3 weeks; no golf or swimming on our weekend away.  I also SLEEP on that side, so that will mess me up for a while too. No massage for a month.  Then April is on maternity leave. (Can you hear me crying ... this might be the most crappy part ... of course, with no exercise, I probably don't need a massage.)

(5)  Ants are back.  I'm beginning to believe they are simply a signal of evil things happening.  Every time life takes an annoying turn - hello ants.  Bug guy coming on Thursday (yet again).

(Bonus)  Spider in the bathroom just as hubby pulled out of the driveway.  Me and my BFF Raid took care of it.  Whew.

That's my 5  + Bonus today.  Is this my final exam from the Universe on all my learning?!?  I might need to retake the course LOL.

I started the 21-day meditation.  I thought it was Oprah and Deepak, but it's just Deepak.  I like it - it's the same format as the INTENTION one I use from him on youtube.  Explanation, guided meditation, quiet meditation and releasing the mantra at the end.

I have the PHB call tonight.  It's a strange coincidence that every Tuesday I start the day HARD.  Up too early, not feeling great, tired ... something out of wack.  I've never woken up on Tuesday and looked forward to be up later on the call.

My picture wall is coming along well.  Set of 9 frames from Target for $50; prints ordered from Shutterfly.  I ordered a sample of photos trying out the finishes and B&W/color.  My other picture wall is in B&W and I love it.  I liked the colored pictures in a satin finish for this wall.  I ordered the rest of the prints.  P.S. the frames are surprisingly nice for the price point.  Well packaged, easy to add pictures.  They'll be a bit tricky to hang, but all-in-all a good buy.  They were only an on-line option.  I'll take a picture when it's finished.

I need to figure out a munchie spread for Halloween tomorrow.  Trader Joe's is going to help me on this one.  Heading there after yoga today.  I was feeling all festive, but another under-slept night puts me back to scrooge.  Probably cheese, meat and dips.  Done.

Truth be told, I'm on the fence about yoga too.  Still coughing, crampy and leaving dogs with the runs home alone for an extra hour is taking a big chance.  I'll decide soon.  Maybe just talked myself out of it.  I need to prioritize today.

Wasn't this a fun post?!?!  Sorry for the blahs today.  Let's end on something from my organized meme folder.  Yep - need to hear this today.

There is HOPE

I'm adding a TMI WARNING ...

Things are looking up.  My cough is down considerably - only wake up in the early hours to cough so I get a stretch of sleep first.  My last "fit" is after I work out, then I'm good for the day (sometimes a little at night before bed, but then I SLEEP).

I woke up to my monthly friend a few days early.  I adjust a couple times a year and have a little bit earlier cycle.  Praise to all that is GOOD ... THIS explains the CRAVINGS and MUNCHIES and all the less-than-stellar eating.  Oh, it was my PMS.  I figured I had a entire week of cravings ahead of me.  I've had my monthly for 38 years and it still can surprise me  - is it that smart or am I that clueless?!?

A few days of feeling blah and I should be back at life 100%

What this means for this morning is NO boxing.  Between coughing (and then having to urgently pee) and my monthly start, I'm out.  Treadmill for the win.

Okay TMI OVER!!  Sorry for such a graphic start to the post LOL.

I made WellFed's Chocolate Chili yesterday.  It's a family favorite.  Whole30 and delicious.  It gets its name because it has some unsweetened cocoa powder as part of the seasonings.  I like it because it's chili with just the meat.  Nothing else - the onions, garlic and tomatoes cook down and it's like a hotdog style chili.  The flavor is great.  The recipe is simple.  I always make a double batch.  No leftovers for freezing this time.  I will get leftovers for lunch though - yum.  We did a toppings bar and it's the perfect fall football food.

I also made TheWholeSmiths (on Instagram) paleo pumpkin cinnamon swirl bread.  It was amazing.  I didn't have coconut sugar so I left it out and it was fine.  Not sweet at all (1/4 cup of maple syrup for sweet).  I left out the tablespoon of almond milk (didn't have that either) and used coconut oil instead of butter for the swirl part.  Super moist with the pumpkin and the texture was spot on.  I have pumpkin left for another loaf today.  I waited to make sure we liked it before making a second loaf.  I had some - not a dessert, more like a flavored bread.

Here's the recipe in picture form.  I should have taken a picture of the loaf too!

My sister sent me this hooded shirt - all dogs (can you even see with my seatbelt).  The middle one looks like my Parker.  I sent her this picture to show I was wearing it.  When I uploaded photos just now, it came along for the ride.  This happens randomly with pictures.

Speaking of dogs ... Aspen is in a diaper.  We have to start the potty training.  Hopefully, the diaper will make her hold it and then when we go outside she'll go to the bathroom in NATURE!!  Plus, she had diarrhea yesterday.  It was a poop and pee days with all the dogs.  Heaven help us.

That's about it for this Monday.  I have a list of house chores, my self-care and dog potty training on the horizon.  Hubby is working from home (dental work today) so I need to get my self-care in early this morning.  21 Day (FREE) meditation from Oprah and Deepak starts today.  The series is about energy.  I'll take some of that, pretty please.  Last few days of October -- in a blink it will be next year.  Later gators.

20 Something?!?!

I wish, but I love the fillers!  It's absolutely filled in the corner of my eyes and the DARK is so much lighter (totally gone in some areas).  It was mildly uncomfortable.  Nothing more than the sting of eyebrow threading or waxing.  A little needle, a little cannula and the filler.  You don't feel anything once the cannula is in position.

I have mild bruising where the cannula inserted and some swelling around my cheekbones (that's where they start).  It takes two weeks to fully settle and lasts 18 months.  AWESOME.

She suggested botox, but I said nope (for now - probably forever).  It would change my eyes and I don't mind my "smile" lines.

As far as pictures - super hard to "show" on photos.  The lighting and flash make it look different.  I tried a bunch of times and can't get a good one.  Even the BEFORE looks fine because of the lighting.  I might try again in natural lighting.  She showed me pictures too and the same problem - she said it's hard to see with a regular camera.

As far as the rest of my life - not great news to report.  Dogs are sick (barfing, coughing, etc).  I'm still coughing at night and all morning.  Food choices have been less than stellar.  Healthy routine has been so spotty, it's barely there (except my workouts, of course).

** Insert a string of bad words - edited to keep this PG **

Well, what can I say - work in progress, but I'm neither working nor progressing well these last two weeks.  Trying with all my might today.  (Yes, I know... do don't try ... but try is all I've got today.)

Let's end this quick post on a good note.  I watched all the Amazon Prime Jack Ryan (I stalled after the 1st episode).  It got better and then got good!!  Loved it.  Season 2 is being filmed.  Also, Pink's remix of A Million Dreams IS available now.  I've listened to it about a zillion times working out.  Love the song and her voice.  Okay, time to get moving.  Later gators.

Eye-Day Fri-Day

I couldn't resist a rhyme.  I'm super excited and nervous all at once.  Stay tuned ... if it happens I'll fill you in (pun alert) and have some pictures.  I need to take a close up BEFORE picture too.

I took off the SNS yesterday and I like my new color.  A pinky light tan - neutral with a little twist.  I tried to take a picture but it looks different on camera.  My nails seem to be "healthy" enough, but I still want a break before I go into the holidays.

I chose my new books yesterday.  Re-read of The Seat of the Soul (Gary Zukov) and The Girl with Seven Names (Hyeonseo Lee).  I never really "got" Seat of the Soul" the first time.  I think it will make more sense now and I listened to a podcast about it too.  A podcast helped with Byron Katie's book.  The Girl with Seven Names was recommended by my Virginia bookclub as one of the best books they read this year.  It's a true story written by a young lady who escaped North Korea.  So far - fascinating and it reads really quickly.

I'm feeling a little overwhelmed again this morning.  I need to "explore" what's going on.  I'm feeling about 75% better, but still fighting low energy.  I'm not getting in my self-care stuff as much as I want and now it's been about a week (plus) of spotty "work."  The habits are new and not well established and I'm getting worried that they are falling off my radar.

Yesterday, hubby took an earlier flight and I lost my afternoon time.  Today, everyone is home early.  The weekend followed by hubby working from home on Monday sets me up for continued lack-luster healthy habits.  I need to MAKE the time and just do it (thanks Nike).

There's also the same reoccurring issue coming up at home.  I feel better, so now I need to spend all my energy back to doing for the family - cook, grocery shop, walk dogs, etc.  AND, everyone wants ATTENTION.  Don't relax, pay attention to me.  No one cares that I might need some time to get caught up or I might still need a reduced schedule of DOING or I might want downtime.  It's as though my time is up on being sick.

I know this comes up a lot.  I know I need to figure it out.  It's harder when I don't have a lot of spare energy or mental stamina to stand up for myself and to not let this get to me.  Instead of working it out, I want to give a big middle finger and be angry.  I've got some learning to do on this.

Sorry to end on a bitchy note, but I noticed the time.  I need to get moving for my appointment.  Fingers crossed ... later gators.

Pink: "A Million Dreams"

I caught this song preview on The Today Show yesterday.  Wow!  It's the song "re-imagined" and it's fabulous.  I haven't been a Pink fan in the sense that I don't listen to her music (I tend to be 80s and country music).  I like HER and how she presents herself a lot though- great role model.  This might be the point that I become a fan of her music too.  It releases in early November and will be on my iPod asap.

Loved the soup recipe yesterday.  Cooked it on low for 6 hours, shredded the chicken and yum!  I added rice for my son's bowl.  I had to stick blend the broth because the coconut milk stayed clumpy - my bad for not blending it smooth to start.  I enjoy a smooth soup so it worked well.  I only have this picture saved - Healthy Little Peach on Instagram.  Throw everything in the crockpot and cook - easy peasy.  I also add red pepper flakes because he and I do spicy :-)

I pre-ordered a muumuu for wearing this winter (ships late November).  Lates By Kate  I got the white and black stripe in S/M (they run big).  Also on Instagram.  She's one of the mormon peeps I follow.  What I love about the clothes the come from mormon sellers is that there is COVERAGE.  The length is longer, the sleeves are longer, the snaps come up higher ... but it's still cute and fun.  Did I mention POCKETS - the good kind, not the side slit kind.  Plenty of room for balled up tissues (it is a muumuu and every muumuu must have a tissue attached).  It's also NOT see-through.  It's actually designed to wear with boots and a cardigan as a causal dress too.  Having my youngest home means I need to cover-up in jammies.  This is perfect.  It comes in S-3X (I think).

I have about 10 pages left in the habit book.  It was good, but it petered out in the end.  Too long, too many examples.  I'm over it, but I'll finish those last pages today.  I have to figure out the next read.  Self-help -- yep, but I also want a fun book.  I need to look through my kindle at all the "samples" I had sent.  I have a stack of 5 or 6 self-help books on my nightstand.  It's a matter of choosing what area I want to focus.

My Important Stuff Journal arrived (I really need to go back and figure out the name of it -- Gretchen Rubin's idea).  Seat of Your Soul Daily Journal on Amazon.  I had no idea it was from Seat of Your Soul.  It's lined pages with a day on top ... March 10.  No quotes, no pictures, no nothing.  Perfect.  Now I need something special to put in it LOL.  PS It was cheap too.

That's all my fun news items.

In other (less fun) news ...

We had a big leak in our shower yesterday.  I called the plumber (as one does), he came yesterday fixed it (for a small fortune) and it's done.  I didn't stress.  I didn't complain.  I actually had a nice time talking to him (he's one of my favorite contractors).  TURN THAT CRAP AROUND.  It worked well.

I ran instead of boxed -- still blowing and coughing.  I'm taking today off in the name of energy. While I'm better, I'm still not well.  Stepping back with an every-other-day workout right now.

I have a nail appointment to remove my very long SNS.  I'm getting normal polish for my break period.  Then lunch out with a friend.  Hubby is back tonight (yea - dog help).

Tomorrow is my BIG, HUGE, EXCITING, TERRIFYING day.  Eye filler.  I have no idea if I'm going through with it - need the consolation first.  Also, because I'm sick and my eyes are puffy, I wonder if I won't be able to do it tomorrow anyway.  I'm nervous and excited.  Will I love it and wonder why I didn't do it earlier or will I be so bummed I messed with nature?!?!  EEEKKKK.

Finally, in the most random of all news ... I was looking at inspiration memes to add to my picture file (because I love having file!!!).  Here's the strange part - as you scroll down, there are FART memes scattered in with the inspirations.  What the heck is that about?!?  Not just one either ... how are they part of THAT search?  Made me laugh though (that they were there, not the memes).  Not a fan of bathroom humor.  Random for sure.

Later gators.

Turning the Corner

This morning is the first in a week that I feel BETTER.  Has it only been a week?  My bitching and complaining makes it feel much longer.  Of course, we all know viruses take 7-14 days (usually) so this one behaved just as a virus does - my bad for expecting different.  I think the reason this felt long was I wasn't able to sleep well.  Usually, I take the heavy hitter cold meds and am off in dream-land.  This time my throat and coughing had me under-slept and cranky.  I love SLEEP!!

The PHB call last night was actually the best call so far (of course).  It was balanced between all of us, we didn't read back homework, but instead talked about stuff.  Much, much better format.  This week's homework is back to being thoughtful and (hopefully) insightful.  The call focused on NOT going overboard with self-help stuff.  Not feeling overwhelmed and needing to do EVERYTHING every day.  Balancing between learning & growing and relaxing with who you are already.  Good message to hear.  I've been on this go go go path and have to watch I don't slip into all-or-nothing.

I stuck to Whole30 yesterday - by the skin of my teeth.  I also ate TWO (oops) RX Bars.  Pumpkin Spice.  I've been dying to try them and I can say, not my favorite.  Then why eat TWO?!?!  Exactly!! Where was that question yesterday??

I got so much off my to-do list yesterday and it's a relief.  I'm catching back up with life.  The big thing was early voting - it was hanging over my head.  I voted straight DEMOCRAT -- my new way of voting in this particular political climate (I refuse to type his name).  I usually vote a mix of party lines based on the candidate (often Republican for local and Democrat for national - works out that way).  Not this time.  The lines were long and slow, but it was worth having it over.

I have a crockpot Mexican chicken soup started already this morning.  It's super easy - I'll share the recipe if we like it.  Healthy Little Peach on Instagram.  I could listen to her talk about anything.  She's super southern, an elementary school teacher and her voice makes everything okay.  She's the type of person you wish was your mom growing up.

I also have a Bon Appetite recipe that was shared on PHB network.  Slow cooked white fish, charred cabbage with grapefruit.  Yum.  I'm making that later this week.  Fish Dish!

The Pottery Barn catalog came in the mail yesterday - all the holiday goodies (I'm staring at it on my table now).  I'm feeling Christmas-y this year.  I'm in the mood to hit the Pottery Barn Outlet.  I have a bit of a shopping bug - I feel it brewing.  I need a couple of things for the house (not holiday) and I'm on the hunt for something holiday too.  I LOVE Pottery Barn!  

P.S. I got some frames from Target - 9 total.  12 inch with matting to an 8 inch picture.  I ordered some family pictures to experiment with another photo wall .... stay tuned.  Best part - $50.  Not Pottery Barn quality, but the price is great and they are nice.

I'm excited to feel like I can take a deep breath again.  My favorite boxing class is this morning.  I assumed I was skipping it, but I might change my mind.  I'll see how the snot blowing and coughing go this morning.  Cleaning crew this afternoon and dinner already cooking.  This day might be better than I planned - woo hoo!!

I'll leave with a cute picture of Aspen.  She's staring to find her voice and she's a spit fire!  Oh boy!  She HUMPED my leg yesterday - little 6 lbs of pure dominance (as long as no one touches her).  This picture is taken in her poop field the dining room.

45 Minutes

That's how long it takes me to get 4 dogs up, pottied, fed, medication admin and coffee in my hand - 45 minutes.  Whew - it's a lot!  First time on my own this morning.  Hubby is out of town until Thursday night.

Update on the journal for keeping important facts about yourself (I can't remember what Gretchen Rubin calls it).  I decided I'd start it - why not.  I might go back with a few things I know for certain, but use it going forward.  Then, I promptly couldn't figure it out.

How can you look back over years and years of entries and hope to find a specific line?  So I GTS (googled-that-shit ... I just learned this acronym, now I'm cool too).  I had the organization wrong.  You get a journal with 365 days - just write the date.  October 1.  No year.  Then anything SPECIAL that happens on October 1, you write an entry with the YEAR.  Bam.  Now it makes sense.  It's fun and not overbearing.  How many SPECIAL things happen on any given day?

Random thought:
I got my little growth biopsied yesterday.  The worse part is a bandaid for 10 days.  No matter what kind I get, I end up with irritation.  I'll know the results in about a week.

Also, thanks to Gretchen Rubin, I have a New Year's Resolution ready for next year.  She talked about The Facts of Life (I remember this title).  Important information that someone will need to know if you happen to die or become incapacitated.  We have it loosely organized, but it needs to be updated and an explanation included.  We also need to update our wills.  Most of the peeps are gone (parents), kids are adults -- time to modify some stuff.  We should also review our Living Wills.

I don't always make a New Year's Resolution, but I like when I do and I keep it faithfully.  It's funny, I don't make big overhaul resolutions in January.  I make specific, doing-type resolutions -- which is why I always keep them.  One year it was no more Splenda in my coffee.  Nailed that one January 2nd - go big or go home LOL.  One year it was clean out all the closets (that took a bit longer).  One year it was organize my pictures.  As I'm writing this, I wonder if I should make a BIG one this year - something I can add to my Life Book (see above).  Hmmmm ... more on this later (probably January 1st haha).  I have something in mind, but need to ponder it.  It's still specific and a do-type of goal, but it would be something I'd announce and hold myself for an ENTIRE YEAR.  Oh boy.  Cliff hanger ...

I'm having a slump with PHB.  We are halfway finished.  This week's lesson was stupid.  My coach reached out and told me Part 2 is not for me - not a value and I appreciate her honestly.  I'm now on limited time with this group (one foot out the door).  She had suggestions of other coaching (exactly what I was thinking about - more on that later).  Anyway, I feel like I'm checking out.  It might have to do with being sick and off-my-bike this week.  I hope that's what it is - I'm not looking forward to the call tonight, especially since I'm missing a fun night at our neighborhood club house.  It's a shopping fair and I usually find some Christmas gifts.

Speaking of falling-off-my-bike (PHB reference), no Whole30 yesterday.  I STILL wanted white carbs.  Dang.  Here I go again.  I think I can get back on the old bike today.  I slept better last night and I'm off the cold meds.  My guess is the cravings will be manageable today.

I ran to Target yesterday (for biopsy supplies) and got a boat-load of new scent sprays.  Febreze Limited Additions.  Why? Because that dang habit book talked about the marketing of febreze and I was sold.  Guess this habit stuff works.  I'm paranoid that my house stinks like dog and I don't know it - I need an odor eliminator.  With Aspen peeing and pooping inside, the paranoia is strong.  AND, now I know why febreze added scent to the product - I felt in-the-know buying it LOL.  The book is interesting (got a bunch read at my appointment yesterday).

My mood was crap yesterday and I took the time to examine what was wrong.  It was a lot of little (very fixable) things bothering me under the surface.  When I figured them out, I fixed them.  Mood gone.  For example, I was paranoid the dermatologist's office had moved locations.  Long story of why (not important), so instead of continuing to worry about it, I called them and asked their address.  Problem solved.  I also was worried I was going to overdraw my checking account.  We've had some big bills lately and I had some monster ones set to pay in two weeks.  It was going to be close and I kept worrying that I'd forget to watch the account.  A lot of the bills are hubby's expenses so we get reimbursed, but I didn't know the timing.  I transferred money to cover all the bills and can easily transfer it back if it's not needed.  Problem solved - worry over.

My point to saying this is I usually ignore the mood and let that worry fester under the surface until the moment comes and goes.  When I took time to notice what specifically was wrong, it was all fixable.  The worry didn't need to brew for days or weeks.  I fixed one thing, still felt pressure and looked further.  It was a total of 5 things festering.  I fixed every single one.  P.S. Best part - they were super easy fixes.

I also blamed a lot of my mood on being sick.  That was the reason I didn't feel well, but not the reason for the mood (as it turned out).  This might be another thing regular people do without effort, but not me.  It feels like magic.  It's mind-blowing I didn't see this before now.  Brain-training 101.

I'm a chatty Cathy this morning.  I could go on, but I'll leave it for another day (or I'll forget what I wanted to say and we'll never know).  Either way - wishes for a great day all around.  Later gators.

The Monday Blues

It's not Monday's fault.  It's more that I'm STILL SICK!  I woke up feeling really dumpy this morning.  Pity party for one.  I'm sick.  I can't still be sick.  Another week of stuff messed up.

No boxing this morning because I can't stop coughing.
No yoga-meditation tomorrow because I have to BLOW my nose -- the disgusting kind of clear the sinuses and I'm coughing.  Not cool during the quiet of meditation.
No lunch with a friend because I'm still germ-filled.

Everything feels hard.  Workouts, errands, chores, dog stuff.  I'm behind on everything.  I don't sleep.  All I want to eat is white carbs (every time I'm sick).

Pity party in full swing.  I will try to turn this mood around, but I don't feel like doing it - why leave a good party?!?  I have a dermatologist appointment this afternoon to have a spot looked at and probably biopsied.  Fun times everywhere I look.

In other news (like anything else is important LOL) ...

I'm reading The Power of Habit which was a recommendation from one of the ladies in PHB (our little group of four).  It wasn't my choice for next read, but I felt obligated to try it.  Turns out it's pretty interesting.  I swear I've seen the book before - it's so familiar, but I don't have a purchase history of it and I can't really remember it.  I've read a few books on habits, so it's probably overlap.  It talks about how habits form in the brain, habits as related to marketing (hello, Target) and how this knowledge can help to make personal changes.  It's just "science-y" enough to be interesting, but not so much you have to skip over too much detail and big words.  I'm about 1/3 finished.

Speaking of Gretchen Rubin ...
I listened to her podcast for the first time yesterday.  This one (#188, I think) was about making a list of life's dates - keeping it as a file or as a journal.  I moved this day - here's my new address.  I started a job this day.  I gave up sugar this day.  We vacationed here this year.  Practical stuff (when you have to remember your last 5 addresses for some stupid form) and fun stuff to remind yourself of what you did that year.  I like this idea a lot.  Of course, I wonder if it's I'm a bit too late to the game on this one.  She points out that everyone plans to remember this stuff (how could I forget the year we went to Spain), but over time the details get blurry and it takes a lot to figure out the when-we-did-this stuff.  It's on a MAYBE list for me.

As far as today goes - it's not a fun day, but I'm going to use it to get some stuff caught up and prep myself for when I feel better.  Chores, errands, paperwork.  A big old list.  Another treadmill workout and arm lifting.  No push again - whatever feels okay.  I'm also committing to Whole30 eating this week.  I need to pull off of white carbs and feel better.  A quick reset is a good idea.

Finally, I'm reminding myself of my favorite take-away from Byron Katie ...  the Universe works for me, not against me.  It's hard to get behind that today, but that's my INTENTION of the day.  Excepting what is, loving what is and knowing it's all for me.  (But, pretty please, I want to kick this sick!!!)

Later gators.

Sunday

This cold (virus) is kicking some butt.  I've moved from the sore throat phase to the cough phase.  All. Night. Long.  UGH!

I took 2 days off from working out because cleaning up the kitchen zapped my energy - nothing left in the tanks.  Today, some sort of workout will happen.  I don't have any expectations, just start and see what happens.

I also took off from my self-care stuff.  No meditation, no affirmations, no journalling, no podcasts, no nothing.  I ate primarily white carbs (except my green drink in the morning) and didn't care at all.  Today, I care (and I probably should have cared yesterday too LOL).  Enough now.  Time to get back to it.

Here's the agenda for today ... it's pretty bold considering, but I'm going for it.

Meditation
Affirmations (while I'm walking on treadmill)
Workout
Dog walk
Grocery store (podcast in the car)
PHB homework (I've done nothing)

This is a big week ahead and I NEED to feel better.

On the dog front:
Little Aspen is improving.  Her tail wags now.  She lets you touch her a little.  Still pees and poos inside ONLY, but one thing at a time.  She even tried to play with Duke this morning.  Resiliency - we could all learn from dogs!  Archie is also improving.  He only pitches half-a-fit when you put a harness on (hahaha), but he LOVES his walks.  They both are terrified of leashes - I don't even want to thing about why.

Nothing else to tell this morning.  The weather is cool, crisp ... totally fabulous.  I'm looking forward to enjoying dogs walks at anytime during the day now.  No rush to get up and out before the high sun.  When the highlight of my post is weather, it's time to say good-bye.  Later gators.

Sleepless in Atlanta

What a night.  I took NyQuil, Advil C&S, booster of Advil (all within an hour - sorry to my liver) and I still was up most of the night.  Good news is my sore throat seems to be subsiding - that was far the worst part.

Then a 3 am wake-up.  Little Aspen pooped in her crate, tried to "clean up" by flinging it everywhere.  The water and food bowl got dumped, poop everywhere.  Fun times.  Fortunately, I had another crate in the room - quick transfer and I have everything on sanitize in the wash this morning.

Guess what's happening today??  Exactly NOTHING.  I'm not even showering.  My butt is sofa surfing while I cuddle dogs.  I cancelled breakfast with a friend, no workout, no nothing.

I managed the hike yesterday, but should have cancelled.  It zapped the little energy I had - I could barely drive home.  It was nice to catch up with my aunt and my Duke dog loved it though.

I'm almost finished with World Without End - love this book.  Just in time since 2 more books arrived in the mail yesterday.  I have a problem.  I think I need to stack them up, figure out the order and get reading.  All self-help stuff - those are the only kind I order as a book, not an e-book.

I'm on the kick of listening to Oprah podcast.  I heard a Buddhism 101 with Jack Kornfield - really interesting.  Also, Marianne Williamson: A Return to Love.  I had forgotten about her interpretation of A Course in Miracles.  I have A Course in Miracles and couldn't understand it way back when - I wonder if it makes more sense now.  I also want to read A Return to Love.  See - I have a problem.

I know I'll sound a bit like I've-found-my-religion-and-everyone-needs-to-find-it-too ... but this is all so interesting.  All these "teachers" say the same message.  I've heard it before and never put it in practice.  I had a slight fit this morning over all the shit happening (dogs needing to go out, dog meds, dog feeding, poop cleanup, ants in the kitchen, I'm sick, haven't had my coffee) -- then I centered with a breath, remembered the teachings and it's all finished.  Trust me when I say this would never happen before.  I'd pitch a fit and then let it ruin my day.  Still pitched a fit (hahahaha), but I recovered quickly.  Progress!

I'm sort of embarrassed to admit it, but I'm a believer.  Believer in training your brain to think about circumstances differently.  I took care of everything this morning and I had a choice to do it with crappy thoughts and feelings or take it in stride.  Either way, I have to do the stuff.  Why not do it with better thoughts.  Not only better thoughts, but with a clearer mind, I set about figuring out how to improve the morning crazy-town that exists right now.  Win and a win.  Tell a better story.

Maybe this is what normal people do already and I'm slow to the game.  It works for me.

This weekend is a whole lot of nothing too.  We didn't have anything planned to start and I'm not adding anything on.  I expect to be back to working out tomorrow.  The fosters have a long way to go so time with them is good.  Looks like the group of them were not only neglected, but also abused.  The other foster is seeing the same in the 3rd one too.  We've got you sweet babies - it's all uphill from here.

I'll leave with some dog pictures and another meme (I'm so proud to be meme-organized lol).

Look at his cute feet!

She's starting to feel better and is now an attack dog - true story.  

He has a MOHAWK!

AMEN!!

Dang, I'm sick (Part 2)

I can't think of a new title and, did I mention, I'M SICK?!?!

It's a wicket sore throat.  I can't swallow well so I'm taking air into my belly and burping non-stop - nice, huh.  I also don't swallow during the night and I kept choking on my spit - fun times.  It "looks" viral and I don't have a fever so not going with strep (hopefully).

Cold meds and an added boost of Advil.  I'm trying so hard to hold my hike and lunch plans today.  We'll be outside (even for lunch - dog porch), so I don't worry about getting anyone sick.  I'm bagging on GNI because I simply can't muster the evening energy.

Our new fosters are in the house.  Aspen had dental work done and she's drugged and swollen.  Archie is so stinking cute, but he's absolutely part crazy chihuahua.  Screams like you are killing him when he has to put on a harness.  He tried to get out of one, got stuck and threw a fit.  We had to cut him out of it (goodbye red harness).  Stinker.  They both slept beautifully so far and HATED getting up in the cold weather.  I needed everyone up because I needed help with the morning dog routine (until I get to know them better).  I imagine energy will change when they get caught up on sleep.

Boxing yesterday was so much fun.  The owner was MIA for months and he's back.  He pulled each of us out of class to "spar" -- so much fun and now the duck and slip make sense!!  I never knew the difference.  I worked out fine, but it zapped all my energy for the day.  I'm going to try for a power walk or a slow treadmill jog this morning if the meds kick in.  I'm actually pretty sick.

That's all I've got today.  I made a folder of memes and inspirational pictures (because I needed one for a friend's birthday).  I finally put them in a folder so I don't have to scroll through hundreds of pictures.  I'll leave you with these words.

Dang, I'm sick.

I have "the cold."  Bummer!  This week continues to be a go-with-the-flow or cancel-everything theme.

I cancelled my massage for today.  I felt the cold starting.  Who wants to be face first with a cold and April is pregnant so I she doesn't need my germs.  I'm on the fence about boxing too.  I have a couple of hours to decide.  If not, it's a home workout - cardio, lift mix.

Tomorrow night is GNI and Friday I have breakfast plans.  Not holding my breath for either.  I know I can muster the stamina for all this, but no one wants my germs.  I'd be annoyed if someone showed up all sneezy, stuffing, etc.

Dogs should be here today.  I can't wait to cuddle those sweeties.  Yucky timing with the cold since sleep is usually an issue the first few nights with new fosters.

The PHB call last night was stupid - I'm not mixing words on this one.  All about sugar.  Same basic stuff I've heard tons of times.  The homework didn't get posted yet, but it's probably along the stupid lines too.

Holly also mentioned they are going to give information for Phase 2, should we be interested.  I'm not interested, but I will sort of feel left out if our group continues on without me.  I'll still belong to the chat group for a year, so I'll have some connection.  I can't see spending more money.  Brooke Castillo has a training program for LESS money that runs month-to-month.  That I might be inclined to try someday.

With my cold brewing yesterday, I did little but sat on my bum and READ!  Finally, some great progress.  Started the day with 700 pages left.  Ended with 350.  And it's so good!!  I will say, I dropped my self-care stuff in the trash yesterday.  I started the meditation and the sneezing started so I gave up.  No long dog walks, so no affirmations.  I finished a podcast and took Duke for his check-up at the vet.  Nothing else.  I need to be careful that I don't continue that during the duration of this cold.  I'm not THAT sick!

I got an email that the Oprah and Deepak 21-day Free Meditation Series is starting again on October 29.  Yea!!  I can't wait!

Lots of random ramblings this morning.  Hope it's a good Wednesday all around.  Later gators.

Unexpected turns ... (and Pictures)

Something did havoc with my stomach yesterday (wonder what it could be hahahaha).  Junk in, junk out.  I spent the day close to a bathroom.

Boxing became an interval treadmill run.  No errands.  I did all my self-care and got some reading in (finally).  My stomach is still not right this morning. Yoga/meditation class is a big question mark.  It's too late to cancel, so I'll go with how I feel - class isn't until noon.  I'll have another treadmill run this morning.

I have a new favorite meditation and I'm actually feeling like I'm meditating (for part of it - sometimes most of it).  Usually, I'm fighting NOT having a thought, realizing that IS a thought and getting discouraged.  Meditation is a letting go, releasing.  It's not a fight or a push.  That's so hard.  The more I to fight to achieve it, the further away it stays.  Brat!!

It's 15 minutes with a visualization in the beginning, a mantra, meditation then a release of the mantra.  It's a nice balance for me and I like the visualization a lot.  Here it is:
Deepak Chopra Intention Meditation

My foster babies are due to arrive today or tomorrow.  A group of 3 dogs (we're getting 2), surrendered after owner died and set to be euthanized.  We think after the owner died, someone kept them outside.  They're all filthy, matted and terrified.  The person who dropped them off never even told the shelter their names.  We all chose "A" names for them and are calling them the A-Team.  Someone else is taking the "perfect" foster we were signed up to get - no one wanted these 3 (the other is a gray fluffy boy).  Sadly, even in the foster world, everyone wants perfect.

Here's a dog-lovers quote that I love:

Being an "Until" Mom

I'll hold you until you're not afraid to be touched.

I'll pet you until you're not longer afraid of hands.

I'll feed you until you know you can count on your next meal.

I'll be your mom until I trust someone else to love you.

I'll love you until ... always."

SIX pounds of fluff.  This is ASPEN.
She is the most scared of all of them.
Soon baby - she's at the vet.

ARCHIE weighing in at 12 lbs.
He had his head in the corner of the wall,
shaking and shut down from people.

Switching gears ...

Did I show my new bracelet with this PERFECT hidden message?  It's my private, little secret affirmation.

After my 5th time in the bathroom this morning (sorry - TMI), I cancelled my noon class.  I guess since there is no waitlist, I can late cancel.  I wonder if I have a bit of food poisoning?  This isn't my normal tummy issue.  I hope I'm better by boxing and massage tomorrow!!  I need to decide on the massage by this afternoon to avoid the cancelation fee.  This week is TURNING all over the place, but I'm trying to go with the flow.

It's only Tuesday, but it feels like Thursday.  Funny how that happens.  Tonight is my PHB call.  I'm curious about the homework this week.  I wonder what's left to cover.  I have too many self-help books in line to read LOL.  I'll keep you posted as I work my way through them.  I won't start for at least a week (World Without End is so well written - a fantastic story, but it's taking me a long time to get it read).

Later gators.

Creativity 101

I listened to a podcast recently and it talked about being creative.  I think it was Brene Brown on Oprah's podcast.  She said not tapping into your creativity, allowing that expression of yourself to be seen, can manifest itself as frustration in the body and mind.

Creativity comes in many ways ... writing, painting, singing, drawing, cooking, etc.  Creating something using your imagination.

I'm not crafty.  I've said this many times.  Not crafty shouldn't be the same as not creative though (thank goodness she mentioned cooking because that checks the box for me LOL).  In the name of creativity and connection, I signed up for a flower arranging class with a friend.

We started with the instructor saying this will be an individual expression of our self.  Ut oh - I thought it was more a copy thing - but she took it right to the woo woo side of flower arranging.  Of course, I took this as a message DIRECTLY from the Universe to ME after hearing that podcast and deciding to be more creative.  I took a couple of breaths (subtly, I'm not trying to be that weird person) and set an intention to allow this to be an expression of me.

All this build up to say ... I NAILED it!!  OMG, it's so pretty!!!  I don't make pretty things so this is incredible to me that I did this myself.  I sent the picture to all my crafty friends to say "can you believe I did this?"  They were shocked because they know me!!

All the arrangements were totally different - using the same flower options.  You know how I know it's ME?  I love it the best.  I wouldn't change a thing.  Now, if you are a creative person, this seems basic and a little silly, but for those of us who are challenged in the area, it's a big deal.  A number of peeps in class got stuck, needed help, couldn't make it come together.  I got in my zone and created - I feel like an artist ... hahaha not really, but it was super fun and I'm super happy with how it turned out.

Here's some tips ...
(1) Flowers never higher than 1.5 times the vessel size.
(2) Change water every 2 days.
(3) Take hard outer petals off roses and they will open better.
(4) Soak hydrangea blooms in water for 30 minutes before arranging - they take in most of the water through the petals, not the stems.
(5) Keep the numbers odd.
(6) Nothing but stems in the water - trim off leaves, etc.

I was looking at another camera - oops.
Work in progress ...

Am I right?!?!  FABULOUS!!

Then the day took a not-great-eating turn.  I honestly don't know what happened.  Well, cheese happened.  The boys were in charge of the food and I got lost in eating it.  Dang.  I need to "review" what happened and why I fell face first in CRAP.  A quick fall-off-my-bike and I'm right back at healthy this morning -- that's the good news.  A mistake is not a mistake if we learn.  BUT what if I keep making the same mistake WITHOUT learning??  That's something I need to fix.  Sundays are turning out to be the hardest day for me.  I'm going to be extra focused next Sunday and end this trend.

I did practically no reading these last few days.  My social calendar was full and bedtime was late or I wanted to get extra sleep.  I need to hammer through more of World Without End before I start anything else.  It's a good book, but so so so long!  I'm extending my no-other-books for this week too.

We'll get our foster doggies this week.  Probably tomorrow or Wednesday.  I've got to get on my game to handle 4 dogs!

This week is pretty chill (until the dogs come).  Boxing, yoga/meditation, massage - hitting the self-care hard.  Happy Monday.  Later gators.

What did you say?

My poor hearing yesterday!

First, Oktoberfest was all day next to the stage - music so loud.  It was totally fantastic and the music was all fun German stuff, but LOUD!  We had a great time at the bar and the booth.  People watching galore.

Releash Atlanta name in "lights!"

Then dinner out at one of the loudest restaurants in our area.  The acoustics make sound echo - everyone comes out hearing a little less and hoarse from shouting.  But the food is great (fresh Mexican) and we ate on the patio because the weather was fantastic.

From there we walked to our local festival, Wire and Wood.  All songwriters - 6 stages, massive party.  We got amazing seats toward the front.  You guessed it - so loud I felt like I was underwater after we left.  I guess I'm old.  The musicians were good, but after about an hour we left.  The songs were their own and everything sort of sounded the same.

Excuse me while I put on my judge-hat.  Watching a bunch of older people (we were some of the youngest in the crowd) stand up and dance in front of the stage, acting the fool to music you know they don't listen to - EVER.  Not one of them could dance.  They were doing moves that were so unnatural and, honestly, a little creepy.  On one hand, good for them for having fun.  On the other hand, sit down old dude - you don't have it anymore LOL.

Remember Oprah saying that you can tell how a man is in bed by the way he dances??  Hahahaha.  It was some fun people watching here too.

This morning is brunch and fall flower arranging with a friend followed by football and dogs.  But before I go ... a little inspiration for Sunday :-)

Someone shared this on our PHB page - LOVE it!!

Later gators.

Oktoberfest

This morning we head into the city for a HUGE fundraiser for Releash Atlanta - Oktoberfest.  We'll be manning the booth, running the bar, begging for tips ... all the usual stuff EXCEPT it's not in the 90s and miserable!  Yea!!

Yesterday started out as a really frustrating day.  Having a full house unexpectedly messed up my ME plans - longer meditation, PHB homework, journalling, listening to podcasts.  I was instantly grumpy and negative looping in my head.  I did affirmations on the dog walk and realized there was no reason I couldn't do it anyway (or most of it, at least).  The big issue is interruptions.  I'm in the office meditating and people come in to ask question, let the dogs in, get something.  There goes meditation.  Same for the HW - it takes a lot of thinking and I don't want interruptions.  This time I told them what I was doing and asked for no interruptions.  Guess what?  They listened.  Dang - why don't I do that more often?!?

I don't know why I feel the need to keep this kind of stuff private.  It's some secret that no one can know I'm doing.  There's no need for that - so I spoke up, did my stuff, felt great.  Win!

PS I still keep this "blog" (journal) private because I don't want them to read it.  Baby steps LOL.

Anyway, after all day at the festival, we are heading to our local town for an outdoor band, dinner and drinks with friends.  This "added" night out would've freaked me out in the past.  Can I eat out again?  Should I drink?  I'm going to be tired.  All the panic and excuses.

It's not bothering me at all.  I feel in control and totally confident in my decisions.  I'm on an uphill climb now and I'll take it!  When you relax into life, lean into things, stop fighting everything ... it's peaceful and NORMAL.  Well, duh!!!

I almost forgot my biggest win yesterday.  Something happened last night that sent me into instant ugly thoughts.  It brought up family issues from long ago and I immediately made up a story of how everything would unfold, how it was just-like-it-used-to-be, etc.  All fabrication.  All assumption.  I was upset and STANDING in front of an open refrigerator when I stopped myself.  I felt the feelings, thought about the "story" I made up and TURNED that SHIT around.  I didn't eat, I didn't mope, I didn't push down the feelings or poo poo them either.  This is a huge win for me.

I feel GOOD about the situation now.  Actually good - not pretend good because I pushed the feelings down.  The turn around gives me the feeling I want and opened up to so many other good feelings.  Again, normal behavior - who knew?!?!

Time to hit the treadmill.  I'm glad it's back for early mornings like this - quick intervals and arm day.

Later gators.

It's FALL!!

This morning is chilling - the real deal chilly (not just NOT hot, actually a little brrrrrr).

Hubby:  We should turn on the heat.
Me: Touch the thermostat and die.
Hubby:  You're mean.

True story - real life drama.

The Korean American Friendship Concert was interesting.  As all symphonies and ballets and recitals go ... good, but TOO long.  I enjoyed it though and worth the experience.

Both my guys are home today.  Youngest got flexed off and hubby "working" from home.  Both have colds - DANG.  I don't stand a chance.

On that note, everyone is stirring so I'm signing off.  Happy Weekend, Happy Fall.  Later gators.

Korean Music Concert

The "weekend" kind of starts tonight.  Well, I'm going out tonight, if that counts as the weekend.

We were invited to a Korean symphony with chorus tonight.  Why?  I have no idea.  This is a woman who works for my husband and her husband is singing in the chorus.  A little background - we've been out with this couple before and they are AWESOME!!  Her hubby is a Spanish teacher and ran a class at my husband's company because so many of their customers speak Spanish.

There is a friendly connection.  But Korean symphony?!?!?  I'd get it if it was a Spanish symphony.  I'm going with the flow, going with an open heart to this experience, but shaking my head along the way LOL.  Why, Universe, do tell - must be some interesting connection.  If NOTHING else, I will use the time to practice meditation (with my eyes open - soft gaze).

Saying YES, doing something DIFFERENT.  This qualifies in spades!

Today and tomorrow are big rescue call days and my homework letters for PHB.  Saturday is an all day Releash Atlanta fundraiser at an Octoberfest in the city.  Sunday is a fall flower arranging class and football.  Fun weekend ahead.  More on those after - I need to get better about pictures again!!

Workout today is power walking.  The storm is moving over (we only got rain, thankfully) and should be gone by late morning.  I'm hitting the treadmill for MY walk before heading outside.  My legs continue to be toast from the workouts this week and I need an easy day today.  Tomorrow is a run so keeping it simple today.  I WANT to run today so badly - get my heart rate up and pumping, but my legs say nope.  If I feel extra good walking, I might switch up my rest and walk day.  Fascinating stuff, huh?!?

My "listening" homework for PHB was a podcast from Oprah - Super Soul Sunday.  I stopped watching that show because it was the Oprah hour (she did more talking than the guest) and so much butt kissing (your property is amazing, you are the best Oprah, thank you for having me, blah, blah, blah).  The podcasts are taken from the show, trimmed down and are good (the ones I listened to, at least).  She has some BIG names on her podcasts.  The guest for my HW - Michael Singer (author of Untethered Soul which I finished last week).  Timely!!  Also, we had to watch a TED talk from Deepak Chopra.  I know have so many podcasts and such little time LOL.  I remember when I decided to add podcasts listening as a new goal.  If only all goals were that simple!

We have a foster on shelter-hold.  If he doesn't get reclaimed, he's ours.  Sweet boy!!  Playing with some names ... Dunkin, Sammy, Scooter.  I can't imagine this cutie not getting reclaimed though.  I hope HIS best scenario comes true, either way.

I'm in total SLUG mode right now.  Can't get myself up and moving.  Rainy morning, nothing with a time frame (until tonight), just me home, tired muscles ... it's going to take some effort to get going.  Best get at it.  Later gators.

More Books

I ordered 2 books, but I'm sticking to my no-reading-anything-else-until-next-week declaration.  One is the habit book recommended by someone in my PHB circle and the other is new reading for PHB.

The Power of Habit

The Book of Awaking

I including these as links because I'm fancy and lazy (didn't want to type the long names) at the same time.  You're welcome.  

Meditation class was a mixed bag yesterday.  I liked the CLASS - stretchy yoga with breathing, supine meditation and savasana.  I wish the meditation part was longer, but, overall, good class.

The issue was before and after class.  I "centered" in the car, took some breaths, set an intention and walked into class to hear a complaining, negative conversation on fair grounds.  Ugh.  It came from the instructor too.  Just as class started, a friend of the instructor joined the class and after class they immediately started talking about life as an instructor and student.  Lots of noise, some complaining, no peace to follow the class, no inclusion in the conversation (it takes time to put away all the yoga/meditation toys, mat, blanket, etc so no quick escape). Not what I was expecting from the instructor especially for this type of class.

Still, I'm going back.  I hope that was a strange day and that's all.  I'm sure there's some yoga lesson in that distraction LOL.  It's all I have on my radar for a meditation class for now.  Fingers crossed for next time.  

PHB call was much, much less emotional (couldn't be more emotional haha).  I didn't start the call a HOT MESS so no expectations or anything to drag me down, but I guess that means no big lessons either - but the subject of goals is a pretty positive one.  This week's homework is interesting.  A letter to your 15 year old self - okay, done that kind of thing.  Hunny, it all works out.  Hang in there.  But, the part that sounds fun is a FUTURE letter for the last day of PHB.  What makes it sound fun is that you use a website service and the letter gets emailed to you IN THE FUTURE!!  LOL.

This is all great for PHB, but I'm thinking what a fun thing to do for turning 50 in two years.  I haven't checked out the site, so I don't know specifics and if that can be done for 2 years later.  I'll let you know the scoop.  I had a similar idea to do with my BFF for 50 - mail each other sealed letters and we'd exchange at 50 to see what we accomplished and what we didn't, etc.  I like this even better!

I also liked our PHB lesson last night.  It's about the 80-20 rule, but not the one I thought.  Basically, 20% is what you are working on and that 20% determines your growth, etc.  The 80% is the stuff you already mastered.  I'm not explaining it very well (probably because I need to understand it better - yep, a book is on the horizon).  The message I took away is don't work on more than 20% change at once.  Master something, move it to the 80% and add something new to the 20%.  You must tackle (and win) a number of games before you can win the Super Bowl.  The "toolbox" of stuff we are learning is not meant as a to-do list, it's meant as tools when you need them.  That takes the pressure off of do this and this and this and this ... now do it FOREVER!!

Today is a rain day (yea) and boxing this morning.  Then tons of rescue phone calls.  Pretty basic day, but getting everything wrapped up for the week ahead of a full weekend.

Later gators.  

To-do List Monster

Well, I did it!  Tackled the UN-FUN part of my to-do list.  It was long and dreadful, but I could do the happy dance that it's finished!

I still have stuff on the list, but it's easy and kind of fun (polish my silver tray, decorate for Halloween/fall, go to Trader Joe's -- stuff like that).  And it's my list for the WEEK!!

My entire body HURTS this morning.  I desperately need a massage or a rest day, but a massage sounds so good right now.  I might call to see if she has anything on Friday.  I have yoga-meditation at noon.  I don't know why some boxing classes make me so sore.  I must hold tension when I hit the bag - or something.  Some of the sore is good sore, some is not good sore.  My neck is stiff and my lower back hurts - both the NOT GOOD kind.

We have weather happening for the next couple of days and I pray to the weather gods that this brings FALL.  The trees are swirling this morning and you can hear the wind in every direction.  I LOVE days like this - it's still humid, but the wind has a chill in it.  Makes me want to run to the kitchen and make pumpkin bread.

I started watching Jack Ryan on Amazon Prime.  The first episode was okay - watchable, not great though.  Sometimes that first episode has to explain so much, the character building feels rushed.  I also noticed Man in the High Castle 3rd season is out.  I really enjoyed the show, but it's so complicated and I forget a lot of the details.  I started watching, but couldn't pick it back up.  I think I need to review last season.  (Interesting problem with Netflix and Amazon - I love that the entire season is available, but when so much time goes by, it's a bit hard to follow when you are OLD!!!)

I'm still reading World Without End.  Still loving it.  Still wanting another book along side it though.  I'll force myself to wait one week before I start another book concurrently.  I have 800 pages left in WWE.  I need momentum under my belt with the book.  It's so much easier to follow if I'm reading regularly (another complicated cast of characters).

I have my eye appointment October 26.  I made it with total excitement and then spent the next hour freaking out.  The CHICKEN is strong.  We have a consultation before (with pictures of people) so nothing is a done deal.  I need to remember to take a BEFORE picture!

My latest PODCAST obsession is Quote of the Day - Sean Croxton.  Each one is under 15 minutes.  He takes excerpts from gurus with a short introduction (and explanation).  It's a quick shot of inspiration and it's introducing me to other people.  All of "my" peeps are on it ... Tony Robbins, Jim Rohn, Mel Robbins, Wayne Dyer, etc.  He gives you the link for the full video if you are so inspired.  I like it because it's a quick down-and-dirty.  I think he has another podcast too.  I'm going to look for it.

I've also been doing some guided meditations from Deepak Chopra.  The "class" I signed up for was a bust, but I like his meditations.  He gives you a focus and intention, then leaves you to meditate with a soft chime at the end (and sometimes a short ending).  Building my meditation endurance.  Having faith that somehow this works for me.

Our PHB call tonight is about our goals.  I used specific goals for PHB instead of my long term goals that I'm working on - it seems more appropriate.  I need to put some time into finishing my other goals so I can review them daily.  That's another theme among the guru population - VISUALIZATION.  Know the WHAT and the HOW will become clear.  That's a hard concept for me, but, again, faith that this works.

That is it from this stormy morning - dogs need to go out.  Later gators.

I'd Give the Weekend an A+

It's about time.  So many weekends have taken me off course lately.  Mentally, physically.  I hit Monday needing a reset and doubting whether I can actually change.

Nothing was perfect this weekend and that's the win.  I ate okay - not perfect, not exactly as I planned, but I enjoyed it all.  I stopped when I had enough, made "worth it" choices.  I got right back to business on the down times.

Mentally, I set myself up for success.  Kept my affirmations, meditation and podcast listening.  Honored my needs while doing for the family.  BALANCE.

My head was clear all weekend.  Not one little bit of negotiation or negative talk about what I could have, should have done better.  AND -- I participated, enjoyed and balanced all the fun.  Who am I?!?!

Now I expect this weekend was the climb on this rollercoaster and I'm well prepared for the downward turn as a part of life (my life).  This was a big win though.  Super big for me.

Do the work and THIS change is possible.

Monday is here and no reset needed ... just continuing on.  Is this what NORMAL feels like??  I'll take it.

Speaking of Monday ....

Today is boxing.  My legs are shot though.  I'm going to have a rest day tomorrow ahead of my noon yoga/meditation class.

I have a big old to-do list for the week, but plenty of time to do it.  Hubby is at a business dinner tonight and out of town until Thursday.  Lots of room for me time too.  I'm sort of looking forward to the to-do list which includes fall decorating!  We have a busy end-of-week and weekend coming (more on that later) and a few down days of organizing feels good.

Later gators.

Exiting News

Drum roll ...

... it's exciting for me, at least.

I've had an eye procedure on my radar for about a year.  I have the worst dark circles.  My hypocritical self started using R&F eye cream.  I bitch about the expense, but it lasts as long as they say, so it's not very expensive over time.  No results though.  I continue to use it in hopes that it will prevent some aging down the road.

My dark circles come from thin eye skin and uneven fat pockets that show the blood vessels.

Can you guess where I'm going ... yep, fillers!!

I've seen it done on an Instagram influencer and that really sparked my interest.  Beautiful results, yet I remained chicken.  What if I don't like it - it lasts 18 months?  What if I have a reaction?

I got the name of a plastics doctor my aunt used to fix her drooping eyelids, but I was still too chicken.  Would they be honest about my questions or spin it to what I want to hear?

One of the PAs I worked with in vascular, now works in plastics.  They do this procedure in her office and she had it done.  Yes and yes!  I asked her a boat-load of questions and I trust her answers.  She looked fantastic.  I'm scheduling a consult to make sure I'm a candidate for it (that it will give me the results I want.)

But what if I don't like it?  It can be dissolved.  Reactions - nope.  Natural looking - yep.  Recovery time - about 2 weeks of puffy eyes (like you went to bed crying).  Price - not bad at all.

I'm so excited I can hardly stand it.  I can't wait to call on Monday!!

My eyes have always aged earlier than the rest of me.  It's in my DNA.  I look far older in my eyes than my age suggests.  I want to even it out.  Stay tuned ...  I hope I'm a candidate!!

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I finished so much cooking and baking yesterday.  I love the Hawaiian pork from NomNomPaleo, but it stinks up the house.  I'm sitting this morning with candles burning hoping to get the smell out.

I have a few last minute things to do and that's it.  I'm glad I took the pressure off today.  I want to enjoy this Sunday (unlike last Sunday).  I can give to others and STILL respect my needs too.  Even my PHB homework (due on Sunday night) is finished!

I'm reading World Without End.  It's such a good story - the details he writes, wow - it comes alive when you read it.  Lots and lots and lots more to go, but I have a feeling, I'll be sad when it's finished (just like Pillars of the Earth).  It's so good and you read it for so long.  It feels strange when it's finished.  I thought I'd hate reading from such an enormous book (I almost bought it again for Kindle), but I actually like it.  It's such an epic read that it deserves a huge, heavy book.

I have another self-help book sent as a sample.  I'm on the fence about buying it.  It was recommended by someone in my PHB group and it gets super reviews on Amazon - it's about habit changing, but I don't have the name handy right now.  I want more time with World Without End.

Today is a run outside with my dog.  I did intervals and arms yesterday and tomorrow is boxing.  I don't want to overdo my legs though.  I won't push too hard if my legs are tired.

I went to bed super early last night.  Friday whipped me and all day in the kitchen was enough.  I'm up early and well rest this morning.  It feels good (and it feels like a Saturday to me).

Happy Sunday.  Go Steelers and Jets.  Later gators!