Waxing Poetic

A little more ramblings of what's on my mind lately.

I'm still overthinking thinking about decisions. An interesting distinction is "what I want" vs "what I need." This came into play this week. There was something I would've jumped to do another time, but this week ahead was not the week. If I said yes, I would be overwhelmed, tired, even a bit resentful. In the past, I would've said yes because it's something I wanted to do so I SHOULD find a way to do it. 

When (if) I ask the universe to give me these kind of opportunities (experiences), and they come up, I should automatically say yes. Right?!?

But I NEEDED something different. 

I said no. 

And I'm disappointed. 

And I know this was absolutely the right decision for me.   

Slowly learning. 

Another little thing on my mind is a meditation practice from Martha Beck. You imagine a perfect ordinary day in your life ahead using all your senses. It's a fun (but long) meditation. 

There's a part in the visualization that I see myself walking in the morning to a coffeeshop. I'm carrying garden veggies and some jars with flowers and herbs. I'm meeting people I know and we're talking and such. It's not a coffee date, just meeting up with people at the coffeeshop. I'm sharing the garden stuff. Talking, laughing, feeling community, familiar friendly faces. 

I've seen this in the mediation for a few years. And it now happens most Friday mornings. Of course the picture in my head is a different look (but not as different as you'd think), but it's that imagined image in real life. I walked to the coffeeshop yesterday, skirt flowing in the breeze, carrying a vase of herbs and a cooler of cucumbers. 

The FEELING matched that meditation feeling exactly.

It makes me excited to think about the other aspects of that "perfect ordinary day."

I believe it's less about manifesting ANYTHING and more about your subconscious knowing what you want or knowing what's in store for your life if you listen. I wouldn't imagine singing in a musical, for example, even though I'm fascinated with those who do that well. 

Anyway ... those are my thoughts on a Saturday morning. 

I'm solo today without a car. Hubby is taking my car to Asheville to deliver a beverage refrigerator because ours broke. He needs a bigger car. I won't drive his lol (long story, nothing bad). 

This means a morning of walking -- farmers market and library return and then a day at home. 

Feels like a FS kind of day. That might be why I have all this kind of stuff on my mind. 

Farmer's market.

Painting.

Making soup. 

Fussing around my plants. 

Meditation (maybe a "perfect ordinary day" ... hmmmm). 

As I often say, I need to use this day for good, not evil. Taking the time to do the things that make me feel good (a.k.a not be a snacking sofa slug all day).

I hope you have a good day. 

Off to walk with Duke to the market. 

Living in a walking town is a luxury I'm forever grateful for and hope I never take it for granted. 

Later gators.

Home Sweet Home

I'm home!

Lots of balls in the air right now. I'm hovering on the edge of overwhelm, but actually doing better than I usually do. Making an effort to balance the calendar better. SPACE, not specifically for nothing, but space to do the quiet things that ground me. 

Garden, cook, creative time, meditation. 

This makes me feel like I'm not giving myself to a to-do list. 

I said no to a few things recently and that's opened space for yeses that matter to me. It's not always so obvious to me, but coaching talks a lot about listening to your body's first reaction. What do you feel before your mind jumps in for an answer. Sometimes the no is a disappointment, but my body knows saying yes isn't right for me in that moment.

This works both ways too. My mind says no way, but I felt the yes in my body first. This happens when fear jumps in to answer the question (aka hiking trip, new volunteer case). 

I'm working on it. 

I want this full life. 

I love the variety. 

I enjoy what I'm doing. 

Yet, I get caught in too much and overwhelm. 

How can I balance things? Watching and feeling that first visceral reaction is interesting. Sometimes I override it because it's not a big deal or circumstance warrant it (i.e. favor for family kind of thing), but I still notice it. 

That's what's on my mind this early morning. A few new yeses and a few recent nos prompted this little chat. 

I have a full day of things today (all good things) starting with a packed morning BUT, the weekend is nothing at all and plenty of time for balance. More on this all tomorrow. 

Little photo moment at the teahouse on the way home. While I waited I added a little note to the wall. What a fun idea for everyone. It's such a welcoming little place in a sea of not-so-welcoming stuff in that little town. 

Have a good day. Later gators. 

P.S. I often mistype 'gators' and it autocorrects to 'haters.' Kind of funny.

See You Soon, Asheville

Here's a little recap of the day.

The mountain walk was beautiful -- foggy, ominous. I saw this stack of 3 for my mushroom picture exchange with a friend. 

. 

I was incredibly hungry and nothing to eat at the house after I tossed the refrigerator, but I was determined to go to the restaurant for an early lunch so I waited for the restaurant to open and thrifted a bit ahead. 

The thrift stores weren't what I was looking for -- not "treasure" hunting, but more like places for people in need so I wrapped it up and headed into the town. 

I never would've stumbled on this restaurant because it looks like a dump down an abandoned road. Nope -- darling South African restaurant. They grow their produce in gardens and large green house, have farm animals. Lovely and I'm glad I waited to eat so I could try it.

Traditional dish. Chutney.
Saffron rice. Beef, eggs, raisin.

Also traditional.
Dried beef and apricot.

My sister's plans changed for the day so she met me for the afternoon and we vintage shopped. I got this fun little rainbow ring. 

It catches the rainbow
in the sunlight.

We ended with a quick visit to the teahouse. I was so dang hot that I got an iced chai instead of the usual, but it was nice to go again.

Home to cleanup and bed EARLY. It felt good to sleep. I was out in minutes. 

I started the exit chores this morning. Sheets in the washer, dishwasher, etc. I'll grab a to-go from a breakfast place to eat for lunch on the road. It won't be a straight shot home. I'll stop at a teahouse, stop for gas, break to eat. I need to be back for a sign-waving at 4:30.

This trip was a mixed bag. I was so relaxed on Tuesday until the storm and everything seemed a bit hard-ish since. They're paving our neighborhood and trees down and power lines still hanging low. It's rolling the dice to figure out how to get to the house depending on where work is happening. I had to try 2 routes to leave (turning around on these streets requires a 50 point turn) and 4 routes to get back. Road access was closed or blocked by vehicles. Luckily there are a lot of little side loop roads. Dang. 

I actually had to stop the car and get out to look at my wheels. I was afraid one side was going to slide off the embankment the access around was so ridiculously tight.

Stopped at the grocery store to replace the breakfast stuff I tossed and it was crowded. I had to circle to get a space. I forget it's technically the city. It took so long to stop for a few items. I was hot and tired and thirsty. Then the crazy driving to get back to the house. Yesterday didn't run smoothly, although nothing was actually wrong and there were a lot of good moments. 

This trip was an adventure of sorts. I'm leaving feeling a bit tired and ready to go home. 

Next trip is in a few weeks. 

Have a good day. Later gators.

WHAT a day!!!!!

Incredible massage. 

Worth coming up to Asheville. 

Worth the $$. 

I'm all loosey-goosey.

I came straight home after the massage -- too relaxed to do anything else. 

No teahouse. 

No meal out (ate what I brought from home -- turns out that was a good decision). 

I listened to a couple of webinars that I hadn't gotten to -- quiet and relaxing. 

I also started a few practice drawings. A friend belongs to a wellness study and gets free tickets to things -- she gets to bring a companion.

She's taking me to a Picasso Portrait painting class. I'm cheating a little and practicing from tutorials. I don't have paints in Asheville so I'll give it a go when I get home. I'm practicing because I have a hard time be artistic in a group setting -- not enough time to contemplate. No quiet space to figure it out. It's not because I want to be "good" haha. It's about wanting to have the creative ideas already brewing. I have no idea what the class will be like and this might not help, but it's actually kind of fun. I plan to do a "real" painting for my bedroom art wall.

Stay tuned for the colored version Picasso style.

Then DRAMA.

Tornado warning, seek shelter immediately. 

So scary. I was in the basement for an hour. Storm was sudden and massive. Tornado missed us by a few miles. When the warning came it was that strange light in the sky with absolute stillness. No sounds, no breeze. That's when you know it's serious. Then bam!!!

Lost power for 10 hours (glad I ate the food, everything else is getting pitched.)

What a night and I'm grateful nothing is damaged.

I have no idea what the situation is in other areas -- I'll find out today. So many rescue sirens after the storm (for hours). Also, who knew Asheville had tornado sirens? That's an ominous sound (I remember from living in Ohio as a kid.)

That was a full range day. Ultimate relaxation to ultimate stress. 

On another note ... 

I started inviting some girlfriends to a Summer Supper (tomato themed --- hopefully still available at the farm) before the outdoor concert in August. Ladies only. Part of hosting something easy and themed. I'm going to practice some Priya Parker gathering ideas. Stay tuned. 

A friend declined since she's out of town, but invited me to come along the following week with her and her visiting mom to a peach farm and then home to make peach preserves. YES!!!!!! Couldn't say it fast and loud enough. How stinking fun is this?!?! Once I learn, totally taking this idea for future gatherings. 

I love, love, love finding creative friends. 

Now for today. 

Thrift crawl in Black Mountain (assuming no lingering storm stuff)

Lunch at a South African restaurant. 

But first, mountain walk. Bears?!?! Maybe. Nothing too long, but I'd like a little nature time before a shopping day. Also assuming there aren't too many down trees, etc. 

Needless to say, I had a crappy night's sleep. I have ZERO sleep resilience. It did feel like camping with the windows open and no fan noise. I heard ALL the critters. Power crews arrived a little before 4 o'clock and that woke me up for the morning. Lord, they've had a long night. 

Maybe I need to work on sleep resilience a bit ... especially if I hope to do a hiking trip with the club. None of the luxuries of home AND a roommate for 8 nights. Eeek. 

I hope for a less eventful day.

Hope you're having a good week. 

Later gators. 

Asheville

I've been in an odd pattern with Asheville lately.

Good morning, easy drive, great mood. 

Arrive.

Feel sad and want to go home?!?!? 

What is this? Happened again yesterday. Woke up and it's all gone and I'm happily in Asheville mode again. New travel issue unlocked? I'm ignoring it. WTH -- not starting this drama. 

So .........

Asheville morning has been all "Asheville."

Decided to run this morning and I'll walk tomorrow. I've already seen 6 bears. They're out in force right now. It NEVER gets old and I hope it never does. Nature is amazing. 

On the cooldown walk -- whimsy in Asheville. 

Someone's backyard.
That's a bold choice in the best way.

Before I left for Asheville. Garden fail. This HUGE cucumber hid in one of the small garden beds. I cleaned it out. Picked things. Went around it over and over AND NEVER SAW IT. I thought the little chonker was a miss until I found saw this granddaddy. 

Bottom on is regular size.
Chunky in the middle.
HUGE at the top.

Back at the house getting ready to plan the rest of the visit. 

Looking forward to the massage this afternoon. 

Have a good day. Later gators.

Off to Asheville ...

I liked my day yesterday. It was a good balance.

I took care of myself and my future self with things that matter to me. 

Walked before the adopt-a-road cleanup. 

Made a summer veggie soup to stock the freezer.

Finished the sign-waving posters (nothing fancy, but easy to read from the road).

Sorted out some hormone RX things for this week (lots of backorder pbs). 

Managed to pick up said RX just as the pharmacy closed. 

Well done, me. 

I'm heading to Asheville for a few days. Massage tomorrow to work on the shoulder/neck issue. 

Chores this morning before I leave though. It's a trip I don't get to just walk out the door, but I'm in no real rush. I don't expect to go out today. I'll fuss around the house, read, early to bed. Tuesday and Wednesday are the "fun" days. 

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I haven't gone to the teahouse for the last couple of months. The timing hasn't worked out. It's not the pull it once was -- guess things are shifting a bit. Planning to go this trip though and I wonder if I'll have missed or it's falling off my "usual."

I'm not sure what I'm doing on Wednesday, but Tuesday is a mountain walk and massage. I'll be toast in the best way (hopefully) after the massage so nothing Tuesday evening, but relaxing.

The temps look better on Wednesday. Some version of thrifting, nature, new restaurant, teahouse. Home early Thursday. 

Even though I'm in not particular rush, I best get going. I have a long list before I get out the door. Have a good start to the week. Later gators.

Adopt-A-Road and Mushrooms

Stomach recovered. 

Did all the things -- morning sprint.

Then a car and truck marathon all day -- 8 hours!!!!

My good old body is TIRED this morning.

But ... I have a nice balance today (I think).

I'm volunteering for the adopt-a-road cleanup with our group. I like contributing to keeping our town nice, but I really like spending time with such a great group of ladies. It's basically and walk-n-talk. The trash cleanup is easy.

It's a road along a river path so I'm going a bit early to take an easy walk -- not a workout, more like a walking meditation.

Then I'm making veggie soup from the garden. I have eggplant, beans, tomatoes, peppers, garlic, herbs. Got some summer squash from the farmers market too.

If all goes as planned, I'm in the craft room for the afternoon finishing protest/rally sign and painting rocks. 

It's a relaxing and productive day before I leave for Asheville. 

Speaking of meditation. I've asked the question a few times about what to do to get my body in a better place -- heal my neck, strengthen without injury. The answers that came up were interesting and I'm following up. 

Are they the actual answers or a step to lead me to the answers? I don't know, but I believe I had these thoughts for a reason.

First -- get back with my PT who helped my back. Took some doing, but I have an appointment in early August.

Second -- once cleared (fingers crossed), start private Pilates training that focuses on recovery. I've found a few local places that aren't workout studios, but sort of a combined PT and Pilates format. I can't seem to get stronger with lifting without injury. Maybe this is a step in the right direction.

Neither were answers I had swimming around in my conscious mind. Meditation (just getting quiet) is a game changer and I often skimp on it or plain old forget to do it (if I'm not in the workout room). I've never meditated in Asheville (for example). Why not? I'm trying to remember to be more consistent. 

On that note, time for a meditation before I walk. 

Here are a couple of cuties I've noticed lately. I've been exchanging mushroom pictures with a friend. 

Have a good one -- later gators.