Shrink - Grow

My friend backed out of the hike today. She said it was too long of a drive for her to drive alone. I'm happy to be a friend and happy to do favors, but it's not my responsibility to hold hands. We've talked about this particular hike with these special blooms for over a year. Blooms only 3 weeks out of the year. She's in town, available, wants to go, and decided an hour drive (it's almost 2 hours for me) was too much.

It's really interesting to see how my friends are "aging." It seems you either find this mid-life time a season of coming into your own and growth or a big shrinking.

I have a mix of friends. Some are so inspiring and I love watching them really find themselves in such interesting ways. And some just get smaller. I don't want to be a person that won't take an hour drive to see something that I really want to see. I've known her for almost 13 years and she was never like this -- always a go-getter. 

The friend who's hiking with me today is a growth person -- probably why she's the only one going today. 

I say this because there were many moments that I felt myself shrinking into being afraid, or deciding to stay home if conditions weren't "perfect" and I didn't like it. It's easy to get caught up in the fear and before you know it, you aren't living your life. I have to be deliberate in what I do or my default will be to shrink too. 

This is probably why it bothers me so much when friends are acting this way -- I'm fighting the same issues and I want to be around those choosing a growth path. You know, you are a product of the 5 people you see the most. I don't think that's an exact truth, but peer group matters and what you experience regularly matters. Definitely what you practice matters. 

Yesterday, I had an opportunity to practice what I preach. I had a fear about picking up my grandson from daycare and running errands solo with him. (It's seated in a situation that happened a couple of years ago with the car accident I happened upon -- too sad to talk about again.) I didn't like that fear because it was stopping me from spending time with him -- so I made a point to do it. No more fear and I'm set to have regular afternoons with him once we move. If I had continued to give into that fear, I would've missed out on a great deal.

It's worth making the effort to overcome what scares you when it's something you want to do.

Okay, that's enough pondering this morning, but probably more on this later. I'm running up against something similar with my bookclub event -- looks like it's bombing. 

Anyway ... I finished the car rock painting. I'm not sure what's next.

Hope you have a good day. I'm excited to see the blooms today and hike an interesting park. Later gators.