Hello, Monday

Yesterday ended up being a bit of a mixed bag.

My energy was LOW all day -- so low that it was almost like I was sick without feeling sick.  I'm on the hormone swing again.  And, now hubby was up several times snoring last night and taking out Chip (with a flashlight).  I was awake from 10:30 until 3:00.  Once I wake up during the night, it's a crap shoot whether I'll fall back to sleep with any ease.  I don't expect much more energy today.

Spanish class was great, but also a mixed bag.  (BTW, the family stayed quiet!!). At the end of class, the instructor read some dialog stories for us to figure out the gist of things.  I had no problem hearing enough to understand enough ... BUT, I don't like the shout-out-the-answers style participation, especially on zoom.  So I stayed quiet and that made her think I didn't know the answers.  Then it was all about me and how it's okay that I didn't understand, etc.  

For some reason that bothered and flustered me when she singled me out to answer question after question.  I didn't want to defend myself so I just acted like she was right.  Yuck.  

I need to show up as myself.  It was strange and awkward.  I'll show up better next time.  Guess I'm learning Spanish AND some life lessons.  Also, LOTS to learn this week and I'm all for it.  It's such a good class.  Mixed bag, but actually all good for me -- even the prickly parts.

I'm meeting a girlfriend at an outdoor shopping center this afternoon to walk, shop (they require masks -- not sure if they enforce the rules though) and then an outdoor coffee.  I'm glad for the face-to-face time today.  This is the GF who's been watching her granddaughter again -- they have a sitter back in place starting today so I'm expecting a lot less cancel and change with her.

Speaking of change, hubby changed up his travel this week and is leaving tomorrow instead of today.  I'm glad to have him an extra day.  He's been traveling a lot.

I finished Anxious People (Fredrik Backman).  Good story, unusual storytelling, lots of good messages.  I have a few books coming today (don't judge me lol!) so I'll pick from the new pile.  I'm in the mood for light-hearted, easy reads and my home pile didn't have any options left.

Best get going.  I need to plan out the week (so I leave time for a lot of Spanish study -- I'm going to need it) and I want to write on a journal prompt from Brene Brown on two core values.

Have a great start to the week.  Later gators.

Sunday Updates

As I suspected, hubby came home a day early from Asheville.  There wasn't anything keeping him and he finished what he needed to do.  It's nice to have him back.

I watched The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window (Netflix).  Short 8 episodes and it's so well done.  Funny, satirical spoof on suspense books and Lifetime movies.  Absurd, but done in such a nuanced, clever way.  It was a little scary and a lot funny and some over-the-top absurd.  

I have my second Spanish class today and I'm ready.  One minor glitch -- hubby invited the kids and dogs over just minutes before the class starts.  I need quiet so it's not distracting for the other people in the class.  Bookclub can hold on mute and I can walk away from the screen -- no big deal.  This is different.  Instructor teaching and lots of speaking requirements during the class.  It has to be quiet with no distractions for the other students.  The dogs SMELL me under the closed door and scratch and cry.  I've said I need this hour and I expect it to be respected.  Boundary -- and if crossed, no more over on Sunday while my class is going.  I asked that they go to the kids' house instead, but that isn't happening.  Last week didn't go smoothly with hubby here and I talked to him about it -- now this week has potential to be worse.  Hopefully, I'm wrong.

I'm really into the journaling prompts -- I did the question about buffering yesterday.  Wrote 4 pages of thought downloads down a rabbit hole questions and feelings.  I ended up at some memories and real crying for a little while.  That kind of deeply buried emotion always surprises me -- I'm not a crier and definitely not a memory crier about something from 25 years ago.  It felt good though.  I stopped as quickly as I started -- it's kind of a different kind of crying.  Left me feeling good, not drained.

I listened to Brene Brown's latest episode on finding your 2 core values -- so good.  I downloaded the pdf to do those journal prompts this week.  BTW she's not releasing any new podcasts until Spotify pulls misinformation about the pandemic.  

Another thing I'm doing which is unusual for me -- I'm keeping the thought downloads to look over them. I usually don't like to keep anything this personal floating around, but it's helpful to give a little space and look them over again.  I'd hope if hubby finds them, he'd be respectful and not poke fun at the crazy talk in my head.  Going all in for coaching means not being afraid to be seen.

Anyway ...

Have a good Sunday.  Stay well.  Later gators.

Brrrrrrr ...

I know we aren't getting the blizzard hitting the northeast, but it's COLD today.  Windy in the low 20s.  Dew is iced over and we are snuggled in for the day.  Good news is by Monday temps are almost 60.

Hubby is in Asheville for the weekend.  We got the sun filtering shade installed in the kitchen.  Not without drama, but all is well now.  He sent a couple of pictures.  We'll keep the shade up unless the sun is beaming in the kitchen -- which only happens in the winter.  It's exactly what we needed.

Chip got groomed and looks cleaned up.  He's getting more and more interesting in interacting with us. Poor baby had a tummy ache last evening though.  I think it was stress from being groomed.

I spent the rest of the morning making tomato soup and more vegan "tuna" with northern beans and avocado while I chatted with a friend.

The late afternoon started sofa chilling as the cold front blew in.  I finished the first season of Belgaria and it was SO GOOD (!!). There was a little moment in the first episode that I questioned it, but it turned quickly to awesome.  

As I said, it's a stay-in kind of day today, but I have a few things to do.  Morning routine, Spanish stuff, prompt journalling, a couple of house chores and then back to the sofa with 3 dogs, one book and TV.

Hope you are staying warm and well today.  Later gators.

Happy Friday

This morning feels super early.  Since I'm having a wide-awake period for a couple (few) hours in the middle of the night, I've been getting up significantly later.  Today I dragged my butt up so I can get Chip to a grooming appointment.  I decided I needed to be worked out AND showered so, hello early morning.

I'm barely functioning.  Good lord.

I started a new series on Prime (but I purchased the season) -- Belgravia.  Takes place in the 1800s and is all the romantic drama of a period piece.  I've only watched 1/2 of one episode though, but it seems to be what I expected.  I'm not feeling Ozark and YellowJacket right now.  Both are too disturbing, although I know I'll enjoy them another time.

Hubby leaves for Asheville this morning.  Quick turn around.  I might travel up in February for a solo trip to clean and have a little time in the area.  There's a possibility the shade will be installed this afternoon.  This company is so willy-nilly, it's hard to say.  If not, I'll try to get it installed when I go next time.  They only do M-F so it's a little tricky.

I journaled on a few questions from my coaching session -- all about connection and what that means to me.  It was really interesting and the more journal prompt things I do, the more I like doing them.  Basically a sheet of paper, write the question at the top and free flow write to fill the page.  

I heard Brooke Castillo on a coaching call ask "what would we find out about you if you stopped buffering?"  Love this question and I'm going to journal on it this weekend.  I might have underestimated the power of journaling to prompts.  I journal about my daily stuff, but not free flow thought downloads.

Dogs are up, got to run -- so I can get my morning going for the groomers.  Later gators.

Friendship Woes and Fixes

Took a selfie taking the dogs for a walk to thank the kids for the new jacket (Christmas present).  It's an upgrade of my usual dog walking jacket which is the same style but ripped and stained.  Quarter zip with a big front pouch.  The bottom continues color blocking with a burnt rust color.

I didn't realize how much I needed some sunshine.  It's one of the core feel-good things to do when I'm feeling blah.  It makes sense that it was needed since I've spent so much time inside these last couple of weeks.  I need to remember to remember .... SUNSHINE.

Remember when I said the day would come that I wanted out of January hibernation?  It's come.  I need in-person contact again.  Hubby is home tonight, but leaves in the morning for Asheville.  Home Sunday to leave Monday morning.  Fortunately, I have a couple of plans next week (if everyone stays well).

The 20 minute coaching session was very good.  I STILL believe my theory that you get a more experienced coach when you sign up early.  Anyway, we talked about what I'm thinking in this (re-occurring) life situation.  This might be hard to explain in short-hand, but here's the gist (without using the specific friend details).

1.  someone repeatedly doesn't show up for me in the way I ask (need, want), but I've asked for support

2.  I tell them I'm feeling unsupported or re-emphasize what I need and get blown-off.  "It's no big deal." 

3.  Then, they want support for something.

Showing up to support them feels unfair to me.  I made a promise to have my own back, speak up for myself, be seen/heard.  BUT ... being unsupportive for the sake of "revenge" feels like I'm a shitty friend doing the same thing to them that they did to me.  My answer was to show up, but with a shit ton of RESENTMENT (which is really hurt in disguise).  That feels crappy.

We talked for most of the session and then at the very end, she asked me why it bothered me so much to show up for them even though that's what I wanted to do.  Because I made a promise to stand up for myself, have my own back and that feels like a broken promise.  Like I'm saying it's okay you aren't there for me, but, sure, I'll help you anyway.  Her take -- but I am standing up for myself.  Asking for what I need, saying how I feel about no support.  I can't have an expectation about what another person will do with that information (can only control yourself), but I HAD MY BACK.  I did stand up for myself.

Whoa.  Mind blown.  I did.  I can have both -- speak up for myself (even with no support) and support the same person and BOTH are still showing up how I want to show up in the world.  Both are having my own back.

Obviously, at any point, if I decide this isn't a friendship worth having anymore I can make a decision to end the relationship.  I'm nowhere near that point with this particular person, but our friendship is wonky right now (for about a year).  My guess is she's having an identity crisis of sorts and will come around when she's ready.  This isn't the first time this has happened in our very, very long friendship.

It feels like I'm have so many troubles with friends lately and I am -- the deal is it's about ME, not them.  Navigating this new me in an old patterned relationship is tricky.  I need to learn new ways to show up, drop expectations and set boundaries -- all for keeping great people in my life.

First step is admitting there are troubles everywhere I look.  That is hard because it shines me in an unflattering light.  What kind of person has all these issues with EVERYONE?  The answer is a growing person.  These conflicts have stayed with me -- I'm not acting out on them.  But talking about it in coaching is helping me show up as the person I want to be to them and INSIDE MY HEAD!  The resentment and hurt don't need to linger anymore.  The feelings happens, but I can process them by showing up for myself and moving forward.

It was a good call.

That's all the long-winded stuff from here this morning.  Have a good day and stay well.  Later gators.

Coaching Call(s)

Good morning -- good much-later-than-usual morning.  Dogs had me up several times and I had a hard time falling back to sleep.  Last wake-up was at 5 o'clock and I decided to go back to bed.  Slept until 7:30 -- that's late for me (since I go to bed SO SO SO early).  I'm never sure if that's a good idea.  Falling back to sleep like this gives me strange dreams and a brain/body fog.  Kind of like a nap does to me.

Anyway ... I'm up now and the only thing on the calendar is a noon 20 minute coaching session.  I have absolutely no idea what to chat about but there must be something ... right?!?!  The issue with these calls is you need to schedule ahead of time.  Syncing a problem with the call is tough some weeks.  Since it's a quick call with a stranger, it needs to be something specific and simple.  But, I'm going all in with coaching so I want to use my 20 minute sessions.

The coaching call yesterday was okay.  Nothing earth shattering.  The only take-away was a few questions to journal.  All about my idea of connection and social interaction.  I won't judge the call until I see where the journaling gets me.  I wish there was some structure when I don't have something on my mind.

I got a final Christmas gift from my youngest yesterday.  Coffee and A Classic gift box.  It was really well done -- well presented in a nice storage box with lots of themed goodies.  It came with a list of where the items were sourced (all small businesses).  The only bummer is the theme is COWBOY.  I couldn't be less into cowboy things.  It came with a cowhide coaster, beer jerky, I Like Westerns mug.  The book is a Zane Grey suede bound Western.  I'll give it a go -- gets good reviews.  Nuts -- I think he used my nickname which is uni-sexed so maybe they thought they were gifting a man??

The cowboy coffee is flavored, regular ground so I used a cold brew pitcher my bff got me and it works well.  This will be great for summer.  The coffee is tasty, but I won't drink much because of the caffeine.

That's about all for today -- days of not a lot again.  Off to find a problem to talk about -- just kidding, but sort of not kidding :)

Have a great day and stay well.  Later gators.

Indulgent Thoughts

I'm still listening to coaching call replays inside Brooke Castillo's coaching program.  Something that's hitting for me right now is the idea of indulgent thinking.

Overthinking something as a way of not actually taking action.  Making a decision about something and still thinking about the done decision over and over.  Indulging in the thoughts and feelings so that I don't need to think about anything new (like future goals, etc).

That's me when it comes to a number of the "new" things I've worked on over the last few years.  I STILL overthink them to death even though I live those decisions now.  I also indulge in complaining thoughts too.  Rehashing prickly situations -- even situations when I set successful boundaries.  Thinking about it and giving myself a pat on the back for doing well.  Sounds good, right?  Not when I think about it as much as I do -- that's buffering with old news thoughts as something that feels familiar and comfortable.

I'm practicing NOT doing this so when I notice I'm indulging, I redirect my thoughts to something future oriented.  Man, it's not easy, but I think it's important.  It's crazy how "comforting" it feels to rehash old stuff in my head -- like watching a movie 20 times.  

I'm not talking about remembering a fun memory or remembering a lesson I need.  It's different and I know when I'm doing it.

It takes a surprising amount of energy to look for new things to think about, but I know indulgent thinking is holding me back from growing.  It's like a speed limiter -- move forward, brain freaks out, spend a day in indulgent thinking to slow things down to feel safe.

Case in point yesterday -- I worked out my thoughts/feelings about the friend situation and then started thinking about it all over again.  Why????  No need, no purpose.  I stopped it, but it came up several times on replay.  Good lord, my brain is persistent.  

Next steps in my thought work.  Is there always another level?  Coaching call today with no set agenda.  I'll start talking and see where it goes. 

Have a great day.  Later gators.

Successful Sunday

Four things that made for a really nice Sunday.

(1)  Took the "hard" Peloton class yesterday even though I didn't want to -- I'd been eyeing it up for a couple of weeks and finally pushed to do it.  Always glad for a tough workout.  I'm sore today.  I waited too long for a treadmill run the day before and I'm paying the soreness price for a few days.  But sore doesn't mean you can't push other workouts.  Yea, me!

(2)  I made the effort to go watch shopping with hubby.  He loves to talk watches and have an experience when he buys one (both things I'm not thrilled to do).  I've been making an effort to make more of an effort with him.  A 30 year marriage can sometimes get the leftovers of my energy.  I'm changing that this year.

(3)  SPANISH CLASS was so much fun and by fun I mean such an out-of-my-box experience.  Lots of class participation -- I was mentally pooped afterwards.  Tons of homework and practice.  I'm so excited about it all.  The instructor is fabulous too.  Class is just 3 of us -- 2 guys and me.  There was suppose to be another women but she was a no-show.  I'm super proud of myself for taking the plunge.

(4)  Connected with the GF who was famously blowing off phone calls.  With my boundaries in place, I was fine with everything and the chat felt good.  Her daughter is hiring another nanny as they decided it's too much for her to do full-time (which means the changes and cancelations will go back down).  I needed to get my head in the right space for all the things.  I think I'm there.

As for today -- it's a get organized morning and a bunch of house chores for the afternoon.  Coaching call tomorrow and not a clue what to chat about.  Oh, and lots of Spanish speaking in the mirror (!!)

Hope you had a good day yesterday day too.  Stay well.  Later gators.

Hola

Spanish class hoy (today)!  Wish me suerte (luck).  I'll report back tomorrow -- and I promise I won't be pseudo-Spanish writing the words I know ALL the time :)

My energy is slowly climbing again.  This seems to be the best hormone time right after my cycle.  I can't even describe how strange and low my energy feels some weeks.  Most of my friends were finished by early 50s.  I'm still crunching AND I started when I was 10 (!!). 

Hubby wants me to go to the watch store with him before my class so he can purchase his delayed Christmas gift.  He flies out to VA tonight.  Morning routine, watch store and Spanish class is my day in a nutshell.  

Here's what I'm reading.  I ordered the book used and this is the first book to come in bad condition.  It's still readable though.  Last in the group and it's my least favorite so far.  I thought I'd give it a chunk more reading (I'm at 200 and it's 750 long) before I might ditch it.  I loved all the other books though so I'm still holding hope the stories come together and I want to finish it.

I finished watching the second season of Cheer (Netflix).  It felt less exciting and more depressing because of COVID, Jerry being a predator and a few other people having rough times.  That said, I enjoyed it and the competition episodes were exciting to watch.  These kids have incredible talent.  

Probably starting Ozark next -- I think 7 episodes have been released.  

Had a long chat with my bff yesterday while I made black bean burgers.  It was nice to catch up.  This is another relationship that feels a little off, but yesterday felt more like the friendship I know.  For simplicity, I'd say she's having a little identity crisis (mid-life crisis) and she's acting a bit full of herself.  It's been going on for a year since she was forced into a new position at work.  That's my armchair diagnosis, at least.  Life is about her and all her things are The Most.  She seemed more herself yesterday ... or maybe I was more myself.  Either way, it was a good catch up.  

It looks like another week of winter here in ATL.  Not complaining (totally) but it is putting a damper on outside gathering (coffee, etc).  In my mind, I'm planning on pseudo hibernation until at least mid-February because of weather and COVID.  I'm using this time as ME time to work on coaching and Spanish and fostering.  

Speaking of dogs -- got to run.  Have a fun Sunday and stay well.  Later gators.  

Blonde and Sassy

Good morning.

Man, the universe wanted to fool with me and my hair appointment yesterday.  As soon as I finished yesterday's post, the power went out -- for 2 hours (we have on demand hot water so it would've been a cold shower and wet hair).  Then my hairdresser was late because her shipment of lightener is out of stock and she had to drive to another place to find some.  BUT ... all is well and my hair is back baby (!!)

Power out means I missed the live Peloton ride for #500.  I took an encore class and got lots of high-fives so that was fun too. 

Spanish class is all set for tomorrow.  Zoom link sent the day of class.  I'm super excited.

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Let's talk boundaries ... 

I've learned to set a lot of them -- in lots of prickly places, but there are other areas of little-things-that-add-up that I haven't set boundaries, just stay super annoyed and frustrated.  Why?  Because they are little things and it feels like I'm being inflexible and asking for too much.

I have a GF who's back to babysitting her granddaughter.  For some reason, she won't talk on the phone unless she's napping (even though her husband is there too) -- I've asked and she won't give a clear answer.  Since we aren't seeing each other with numbers high, she schedules phone chat times.  

Yesterday was like every time -- call set for 3 o'clock -- get a text at 3:05 that the toddler isn't napping so we need to talk another day.  Even though it's a phone call, I rearrange my day to accommodate the timed call. 

This happens so much (she babysat for an entire year recently and is back since the sitter quit).  I thought it was over since her daughter hired a nanny, but my friend will sit indefinitely now (and they want another baby).

I can't keep doing it.  I didn't know how to handle it before so I waited it out, but we're back to the same circumstance again -- oh, and she never, ever apologies.  It feels disrespectful of my time.  But at the same time, complaining feels small and petty.  

I thought about it last night and decided NO MORE TIME SETTING.  Call if you can and if I'm available, we can talk.  That way I'm not making adjustments for phone catch-ups that rarely happen (or they get pushed, moved, changed ... all for a 15 minute call).  Totally not worth it.  If you are only able to give me scraps of your time, I accept that, but I won't jump through hoops for it.

Done and dusted.  It hasn't come up since the canceled call yesterday, but I'm set to let her know my boundary when it does.  "Let's not set a time because that doesn't work well when you're babysitting -- just call when you can."  If she pushes that, then I'll explain my side more clearly.  

Glennon Doyle says it so well ... anger shows you where you need a boundary.  I've needed a boundary for quite some time with this situation.  Ultimately, boundaries strengthen friendships.  With this boundary in place, no more frustration on my end and it still allows her to talk when she's comfortable.  Win-win.

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Long chat today.  Hope you're set to have a good Saturday.  Stay well, folks.  Later gators.

HAIR DAY (!!)

It's not often I really look forward to my hair day, but today I am busting to go.  Too long, too dark/gray, too frizzy.  Smooth and blonde by this afternoon.

I made the new recipe yesterday.  Chickpeas, sweet potatoes, etc with a tahini sauce.  It was tasty.  Today is black bean burgers.  

I spoke too soon about my energy being better.  I'm tanked again this morning -- for no reason.  Ate well, slept well.  Dang.  Today is my 500 Peloton ride so I best rally to make a descent showing.

I have so little to say, it's pathetic.  

Oh ... I had the 20 minute coaching session and we chatted about alcohol and what I want my relationship to look like.  Spoiler alert -- I want it to be a super casual, lunch once a year, but I knew you well back in the day kind of friendship.  Working on my definition of that friendship.

Spanish class starts on Sunday and I realize I have no idea how I'm getting into the class.  Emailing today. Maybe a zoom link is sent?  First day logistics are always a little wonky.  There are only 6 classes so I don't want to miss #1.

Happy Friday.  Happy weekend.  Stay well folks.  Later gators.

Thursday Things

This week hasn't gone exactly as expected, but overall, I'm feeling a lot better (i.e. hormones are easing up).

I DID workout after the cleaning crew yesterday and it wasn't easy to make myself do it.  I seriously contemplated a skip day.  Kept my promise though.

Botox didn't go as easily as last time.  I didn't get an ice pack, but I thought maybe that was overkill last time.  Nope.  I'm bruised and swollen.  Google let me know icing BEFORE and IMMEDIATELY after can stop that from happening.  WTH.  It's not like I have an icepack in my purse.  Next time though.

Google also let me know, no strenuous exercise 24 hours after injection as well.  Given how sore and swollen I am, I think I should follow that rule today and have a rest day today.  On the fence a little since I know I didn't curtail exercise last time.  OKAY -- just googled what can happen IF you exercise ... eyelid droop, migration.  Looks like a rest day today.  Vanity wins.

Headed to Trader Joe's with a new recipe in mind.  Chickpea, sweet potato over mashed cauliflower with tahini sauce.  Sounds good.  I also made a quick coffee smoothy from Nom Nom Paleo's new cookbook.  Iced coffee, frozen banana, protein powder, vanilla and almond milk.  It was good.  I have enough for another one this afternoon (it's decaf coffee).

I have a noon SCS 20 minute coaching session.  I figure, why not.  Life is quiet right now and let's use all the resources.  I don't have a question thought of yet, but I'll work on that this morning.  BTW, my coach is at a coaching retreat per an IG photo.  Do I wonder if she'll have COVID next call ... yep!

Dare I say ... HAIR DAY tomorrow?!?!  Maybe I should whisper it instead.  I can't wait to have my hair back to normal.  Oddly, the worse part of this massive grow out is the texture of uncolored hair.  It's limp and almost seems greasy (dark and limp in contrast to the rest of the hair).

Oh ... and some fun news.  We got invited to a September wedding in CO.  My DIL's brother is getting married.  We've known her brother for about a decade and met his fiancé at our son's wedding.  Apparently, she said she liked us a lot and we scored a wedding invite.  It feels like such a sweet inclusion.  We can't wait -- totally didn't expect it.  Looks like dress shopping this fall :)

That's all from here.  Have a great day and stay well.  Later gators.

Cancel Week?

Oh my lord -- so many things are getting canceled.

No coaching call yesterday.  I have no idea why.  I didn't get the link so I went into the coaching application and it wasn't scheduled.  Guess she was off and I guess the way to know is to look at upcoming calls.  It's no big deal -- I bought the number of coaching calls and this pushes it out a little more.  I sort of think it's better -- every week is a lot.

I decided to use that time to write my thoughts from last week's coaching and send them to her.  One of the goals is to use the coaching fully.  We can communicate via email all week if I want.  I expect to hear back before my next call -- maybe not until Monday if she's away this week.

I was suppose to stop by my eldest's today to drop off an older Apple Watch for my DIL since I'll be in the area for my "11" injections.  He has conference calls all afternoon now.  No visit with him and the grand-pups.

A shopping outing with my aunt next week was also changed up.  Funny that it all happened yesterday.  

Please, please let me hair appointment happen on Friday (!!)

Now some fun news -- I submitted Chip's story for Transformation Tuesday on Run For Cookies blog and he was featured.  I STILL can't comment on blog posts though.  I think that's a call for Apple Care -- no amount of googling is helping.  It has to be a hidden setting somewhere.

Nom Nom Paleo's new cookbook arrived yesterday.  It's a beautiful book!  I bought it because she has some plant based recipes this time -- not as many as I would like though.  That said, I'm definitely cooking from it.

I finished Lucky and I can't say I liked it much which is odd since my friend's recommendations have always hit for me.  For as gritty of a life as Lucky had, the book wrapped up in the neatest bow ever.  I'm all up for an easy read book, but the style of writing didn't hit with me either.  Oh well.  Next book pick today.  

Having a bit of an odd day today.  Cleaning crew this morning and THEN workout.  It's only an arm/yoga day so I decided to walk the dogs while they're here and then do my workout so the morning is more relaxed.  Afternoon appointment for "11s".  I can tell it's time.

Have a great day and stay well.  Later gators.

Staring With a Little TMI

Today was supposed to be the first day of the week I ventured out and about BUT ...

... my monthly came with a bang last evening.  No warning -- just weeks of hormonal shit making me wonder if it was going for good.

I canceled a coffee date with a friend.  We planned an outside chat after she dropped her foster at my groomer.  It was an early and cold plan.  I knew I needed SLEEP, frequent bathroom breaks and a non-rushed morning.  I chose me first.  I chose myself first and I don't do that often in circumstances like this.

How do I start feeling like I don't always come in second?  

Start treating myself like I count TOO.  The important thing is TOO.  I considered my friend with this change as well.  I made an early decision (didn't wait until this morning).  I knew she had to go to the groomers anyway so this wouldn't be a huge inconvenience.  I also know that at any point work can add a conference call onto her schedule and we have to cancel or adjust.  I explained why (not that I had to, but that feels polite to friends) and we'll postpone once she knows her work schedule for next week.  This decision feels good in so many ways.  As Brooke Castillo says -- like your reasons.

So I like my reasons to change up today.  Coaching call this afternoon and nothing else planned.  I'm going to get find a couple of new recipes and make a grocery list for this week.

Dog duty is calling so extra short today.  Have a great day and stay well.  Later gators.

Choose the Bigger Life

It's Monday, but a holiday (MLK day) so it's a clear day on the calendar again.  Tomorrow starts "lots of things," but today is another home day.

Bring on the house chores and such.  Got some cooking to do, sheets, paperwork, etc.  Get ready for the week.

Here are a few snow pictures from Asheville.  So pretty.

And from my bedroom window in GA.

Yesterday I mentioned the vision board of things looking toward my future self.  I decided why not try to get that look started and ready for our anniversary trip in November.  I ordered the dress from Amazon (only $35) and ordered a sunhat for BIG heads (need a speciality store).  

It's essentially my NEW green dress situation.  Something to strive toward.  I'm missing that right now.

Speaking of that -- I'm set to hit 500 rides on the Peloton this week and I'm thinking of doing a live ride.  This'll take a little work to time everything, but it might be fun.  It's time to start moving forward again.  January has been a sit back, slide back month and I'm ready to move ahead.

Where does this start?  MY DIET as always (energy).  I'm super sensitive to certain foods and yet I'm eating too much of them.  Cleaning that up this week -- where have I heard that before??  Oh, yeah, from me ... over and over.  Life's work or something I give up on too many times?  Good lord.  

Anyway, I'm reminding myself of my birthday year motto -- Choose the Bigger Life.  And, for me, that means make all those LITTLE decisions that add up to a great year, month, week, day.  The little decisions are easy to blow off but man they make a huge difference.  "Little by little, a little becomes a lot."

Like ... take the live ride.  Make the new plant recipe.  Order the fun dress.  Start planning a bigger garden.  Take a walk somewhere new.  Try a Peloton boxing class.  

Change things up.  Add variety.  Focus forward.

That's my pep talk today.  I hope I listened well.  Hope you have a great start to the week.  Later gators.

Snow Day

Ice is here -- snow is coming.  It's windy and strange out -- frozen trees knocking and crackling.  As long as nothing crazy happens, it's kind of fun to be "snowed" in.  Looks like up to 3 inches coming??  I'm not sure how much will stick because it's soaking wet out there (with ice on trees, yard and driveway).

Asheville is set to be SLAMMED.  Fingers crossed for our old house to survive this storm.  I'm not as confident about it.

So pictures on the new computer ARE ALREADY ON MY COMPUTER (!!). Who knew.  Since I upgraded the cloud storage, it's all backed up to the cloud.  Looks at that fancy thing.  

Here are a few Chip pictures because that's all I've been taking lately. 

I'm making a vision board picture folder on my computer.  Future self stuff seems to start with outside image for me.  Sometimes I see something that makes me think of my future self.  I wish I had saved pictures because so many have come true.  Years and years ago kind of thing.  I saw this and thought -- THIS IS ME this year.  It says carefree and casual with a bit of style -- enjoying somewhere special.  Not this exact outfit, but something similar.  I know this might sound strange, but feeling like the outside matches the inside is such a boost to making those inside changes.  AND, it's fun to do.  Double win.  

Okay, stay safe and warm ... and maybe get to enjoy a cozy day.  Later gators.

ZZzzzzz

Chip slept (!!)

I think it was the drugs more than pain -- he was out of sorts and confused.  Not a peep out of him all night.  Yea for both of us.

As expected, I did very little yesterday.  I finished watching Hacks (HBO Max) -- liked it a lot.  Second season has a green light, but the pandemic is delaying it already.

Quick trip to Costco in the mass hysteria to get a few things.  I debated waiting until next week, but I still wonder about supply chain issues after the storm hits the south.  Glad I got gas the day before though -- the lines were insane.

Still no definitive storm predictions since we are on the very edge of everything.  Asheville will get hit though and with above ground utilities, I bet outages will be significant.

I'm STILL glad to be nesting this weekend with no-one to see and nothing big to do.  Hubby has a sports agenda all weekend so more me-time.  I want to read more of Lucky and find something new to watch.

One thing I want to get back to doing is cooking new (or any) recipes again.  I'm food bored.  Making basic roasted veggies, stir fries, etc and then snacking dinner.  Not good.  I NEVER feel my best eating this way.  I've been lazy on the cooking front because my energy is low.  But eating well helps my energy. Circling ... AGAIN.

Tuesday starts a full week and the end of my nesting hiatus.  I wonder if I'll be happy about it hah!

I have a couple more computer things to setup this weekend.  Photos and printers.  I'm forcing myself to use the new computer.  Most people would be so happy ... I wish I never had to change technology.  Pity party problem.

Have a great weekend and stay warm in this storm.  Later gators.

Only 2 Things

(1)  Chip had a successful dental but was up THE ENTIRE NIGHT crying and howling.  I brought him into bed for part of the night, took him to potty several times, fed him twice (which he gobbled).  First night is the worst -- poor baby and THEN, poor me.

I think part of it was from being sedated.  He seemed confused and scared.  When he was walking around, he seemed okay and he'd cuddle in bed for about an hour and then get restless.  No way I could sleep when he was in bed.  I was concerned he'd fall off our really high bed.

To say I'm tired is about the biggest understatement.  

I'm so tired, I just took a minute to remember the SECOND thing lol.

(2)  Atlanta is bracing for winter weather Saturday night and Sunday and that's a big thing here.  Roads aren't treated, snow/ice trucks are few and far between.  It's all about a couple of degrees so we wait and see.

I hadn't heard about it until a neighbor mentioned it while I was walking the dogs.

I did a quick run to the grocery store.  Maybe another trip today for better veggie options (so scant in the stores). Filled up on gas.

I don't expect to have the roads impassable for long, but with supply chain already limping along, I was concerned about next week.  I want to be prepared.

Our electric company emailed to say get ready to be without power -- really?  I guess if it's an ice storm, that'll do it.

Today is a rest day from working out and I'm expected to do very little all day.  Hubby comes home late this evening.  Pretty please let Chip and ME sleep tonight.  

Later gators.

Some Thursday Updates

Hello.  Here's a quick list because it's extra random again this morning.

(1)  I had a problem with my Spanish class login and ended up having a zoom call with the instructor.  I'm extra, extra excited to start now.  Of course, she started the call in Spanish and I choked answering back in Spanish -- just said um, um, um until she spoke English.  Oh boy.

(2)  Finished The Dark Side of Magic.  It was a fun book.  I'm not sure 2 more in the trilogy are calling to me yet though. 

(3)  Next book is a recommendation from my girlfriend who read it over Christmas and said she couldn't put it down.  Lucky (Marissa Stapley).  I ordered it from Goodwill (through Amazon).  Turns out it's a Reese Book Club pick.  

(4)  I watched an episode of Hacks and it's a good start.  Jean Smart is such a fantastic actor.

(5) Chip has his dental surgery today -- tooth extractions, fistula repairs, etc.  Fingers crossed and a little prayer the sweet boy does okay.  He was a little playful after his medicated bath yesterday.  The pain medication and strong antibiotic seem to be helping.

(6)  I had a good 20 minute SCS coaching call.  The more I have my own back and set a seat at the table for myself, the more I find resistance in relationships I allowed a different dynamic.  I speak up and then am dismissed.  It's about creating some boundaries so I don't feel resentful.  The more I work on myself, the more disappointed I'm getting at some of my relationships.  Was every relationship built on a false dynamic?  It's my doing and also my responsibility for the undoing.  This was a helpful conversation.

Interesting find ... the more in advance I book the appointment, the better a coach I get paired with -- at least that's my experience so far.  When I do an appointment same day or the next, the coach has sucked.  Is that just a coincidence or does she reward the planner?  Hmmmm. 

(7)  My energy seemed a bit better for yesterday's Peloton ride.  I took a hard class and didn't have a problem riding in range.  I'm ready to feel better.

(8)  Podcast listening is still going strong.  My favorites right now are Glennon Doyle, Brene Brown, PopCast and I'm having fun with Gretchen Rubin again.  I'm slacking on The Armchair Expert and Brooke Castillo's general podcast (more a sales pitch these days).  Of course, I listen a ton to her podcasts within the program.  I'm also a little "off" Jen Hatmaker.  Her interview style kind of grates on me -- everyone is the best and the most and the dearest.  I catch some random other podcasts here and there too.

(9)  I'm enjoying this week at home (mostly home).  Nesting feels super good still.  As I said before, I'm sure I'll suddenly crave people, but until then ...   Next week is more people centered so I'm enjoying what I have this week.

Have a good Thursday and stay well.  Off to wake up Chip and take him to the vet.  He'll be bummed about no breakfast -- poor baby.  Later gators.

Coaching Recap

Well, COVID strikes again -- no hair appointment on Friday because my hairdresser tested positive.  Her husband was well out of isolation so I think she contracted it from work.  Roots and more roots.

Coaching call was interesting and a bit weird -- close your eyes kind of thing.  Talk to your younger self.  Also a bit strange.  I'm working on the idea that I'm not important enough -- other people (friends, etc) take priority.  I let them.

This is about the little things.  Change a walk time because your errands are running late (what about my time).  I call you to talk about something and the conversation turns back to you (so you must have something more pressing).  Little things like this that upset me and reenforce a strong belief from childhood.  I won't go into all those stories, but I know how it developed.  The problem is I can't seem to stop the pattern.

I know I have a strong reaction (over reaction) and I want to change that because it's creating a lot of aggravation and resentment.  I speak up for myself and if that's not heard or respected or acknowledged, I have no idea what to do next.

No solution yet.  We're going to role play some situations and see what I could do differently or think differently.  If I can work through this issue then FOR SURE the coaching will be worth the money.  

Speaking of coaching, I have the 20 minute SCS session this morning.  I don't have my question yet, but I think I'll bring the more petty things (for lack of a better description) to these calls.  I don't have a specific one this week, but I can bring one of the little things I felt less important and see what they say ... hmmm.  This is the issue with the calls -- not long enough or same coach so things need to be quick and simple.

Another home day today.  I'm thinking about taking my dogs to the park for a sniff.  I finished Dexter -- no spoilers but, dang (if you know, you know).  

Have a good day and stay well.  Later gators.

Advocating

Little Chip is a hot mess and the intake vet did a neglectful job (only a vet tech saw him).  I advocated hard to have an exam by another vet to get him proper care.  The new vet was reluctant sighting he just had an exam and they "agreed" with the decision based on that exam.  I kept saying HE WASN'T EXAMINED (!!)

I pushed and pushed.  He got the exam yesterday (6 hours) and is scheduled for surgery on Thursday.  The vet was shocked at what they missed.  Yep, I told you he was very sick.  Hang in there, little man.  Fingers crossed he survives the surgery -- he's so sick.

I had massive anxiety over the exam.  Specifically, what if I was wrong -- egg on my face big time.  But, I reminded myself advocating for those who can't is always the right decision.  If I was wrong, I was wrong.  Reminding myself didn't help much during that fitful sleep, but it did yesterday.

Anxiety feels manageable again.  Whew and phew.  That feeling is no joke.

What also helped the anxiety is that I went item by item and problem solved some scenarios.  I'm worried hubby will contract COVID from his work travel this month.  I didn't have a house plan for if he got sick.  All planned now and he agreed to the setup for isolation too.  I turned in the coaching HW.  I wrote lists.  I got organized.  Plans relax me a lot.

I have a perfectly nest-filled day today.  I don't need to go anywhere.  Coaching call and hanging around the house.  Strong morning routine, a few chores around the house and nothing else.  Maybe a puzzle again.  Maybe a phone chat with my good friend.  Some reading -- magic book is okay, but I'm still in the character introduction stage so no flow yet. I have a couple of recommendations on TV (All Creatures Great and Small; Hacks).  Also, last episode of the new Dexter recorded.  I hope it comes back for another season.

It was a long day with Chip yesterday so I'm glad for a quiet day today.  I waited about 2 hours outside the vet (no going inside thankfully) and then they asked to keep him.  Went back for another hour plus before we were done for the day.  Poor baby.  

Today feels like an upswing -- Chip is getting the help he needs, anxiety is under control AND I have a hair appointment on Friday (my hair is a mess right now with really dark roots).  I could use a nail appointment but that needs to wait until numbers are under control again.  Funny how much better I feel when the outside is all tidied up too.

Have a good day and stay well.  Later gators.

Do I Look Different?

Coming to you on a new gold laptop.  I'm about halfway setup.  So far, it's meh.  I'm sure I'll love it once I get fully setup and used to using it.  Right now it feels like effort to do most everything.  I FINALLY got my email to sync and load to the email "spot" on the computer.  Proud that I figured it out myself -- gold star for the gold computer.

Apple is very user friendly, but I'm not interested in "exploring" the new stuff -- just get me up and running.  Then I can fiddle at my leisure (aka never lol).

The good part -- key pad touch is really nice.  I like the feedback when you type.  The keyboard is a slightly different size though so I'm messing up a bit more than usual.

I need to transfer photos which I'll try this weekend.  I decided not to sync the computers because I don't need the junk transferring over too.  I might not have a choice though and this might need a call to Apple Support.  Until then, 2 computers.  

In other news ... I'm in a crazy anxiety mood.  I think it's hormones, but holy cow, it's bad.  I don't have anxiety on the regular, but I'm worried about everything right now.  That's how I know it's not real.  I kept waking up last night in a panic.  Still feel off this morning.

The Ashwagandha was helping a lot, but it is the cause of the heart palpitations.  It might be that I was taking half the dose (only at night) and then increased to take the morning dose too.  I'm thinking about going back to the half dosing (which was working) and see if that's okay.  It might also have been the duration, but that seems less likely to me.  I certainly don't want to have a heart issue from taking it, but I'm on the struggle bus with so many things and it was helping.  Prescriptions are an option, but not without side-effects too.  Many of my friend's doctors have suggested Ashwagandha to them so it seems safe enough.  I couldn't take fish oil because of esophageal spasms of all things.  I'm sensitive to things.  

I need to get going to submit my coaching homework.  I hand wrote it and now I need to type it in.  This was one of the things I woke in a panic about -- I need to submit it today and what if I forget.  Seriously?!?  Generalized anxiety.  I'm doing reasonably well with stopping it each time.  Reminding my brain this is just hormones and off the rails thoughts causing these feelings -- there are no real concerns happening.

Jeez.  

Let's make this an A-okay week.  Can we do it?  I hope so -- I know most of us are having a hard time.  Stay well (so I don't need to worry about you too).  Later gators.

Procrastination at It's Finest

If I do say so myself!

Computer TODAY or tomorrow or by next weekend.  I promise lol.  Hubby wanted to watch the football games and the day got ahead of me.  I had no extra energy or desire to put into setup.  I did open the box though.  Hah.

And, now we're having the kids over to watch the Steelers game.  Maybe all 4 of them (waiting for youngest to text me back).  Not thrilled about youngest over because of COVID (eldest just had it so he's in his super-immune phase right now).  Hubby initiated all that and I said okay, but I'm not cooking.  Pub subs and snacks from the grocery store.

Here's the book I'm reading.  It's 1 of 3 and I have the trilogy set (bought it used on Amazon).  It gets great reviews.  I'm not far enough yet -- stay tuned.  Magic fantasy.  I was in the mood for light and fun (even though the title says "darker").  It's a YA read.

Look at these adorable pictures of Duke.  The phone camera is SO GOOD (!!)

I started and STOPPED YellowJackets (I can't remember streaming service). It's awful and disturbing.  Not the kind of thing to bolster a mood.  Plane crash with a soccer team and the secret that's haunting them as adults.

Last Dexter episode tonight.  Somehow this show isn't disturbing at all.  I'll catch it tomorrow.

Have a good Sunday.  Later gators.  

Cozy at Home

I think the combination of things (post-holidays, COVID numbers, energy, weather) is leaving me happy to be a homebody for a little bit.  Next week has a few things, but only one day of early morning stuff.  

I'll take it.  

With low energy comes a low mood and that's another reason being home feels safe and good.  I like not seeing anyone and not having anything social pending.  I don't have to "pretend" to be upbeat or join the collection complaining about the state of affairs that makes me feel anxious.

I'm sure this will turn and I'll be suddenly lonely and want to see people, but for now this is nice.

I finished Will Smith's book.  It got a lot better (for me) once it hit the television days since that's the Will Smith fame I remember.  Still, about half the length would've worked just fine.  Onto something new today.  Stay tuned ...  

Here's another jacket I got awhile ago in Asheville.  It's super thin, but VERY warm.  It was finally cold enough to wear it yesterday.  And, Monti got to wear his fleece jacket too -- handsome pup!

Today is the dreaded new computer setup day.  If all goes well, I'll be on the new computer tomorrow.  If all doesn't, I'll still be using this old one until I figure the out the transition.  If I don't check in, well, you know -- time to call the Apple Ladies.  Other than moving over pictures, I don't plan to move anything else.  I want to clean start the links I use now.  Is that a good idea???  That way BOTH computers should be fine.  Maybe they're both fine either way.  I'm really, really daft when it comes to computer knowledge.

I was able to finish a Peloton ride yesterday, but it was HARD.  I think today will be a rest/recovery day.  I usually have a plan for the week, but I'm doing it little differently right now.  I need more rest days in the schedule when I feel like I need to rest.  

That's enough babble.  Have a great weekend and stay well.  Later gators.

Already Friday ...

I HATE this low energy thing again.  It's like moving through sludge.  Tired without being sleepy.  I get it for a couple of weeks a month these days -- and it's back since I stopped the Ashwagandha.  I forgot how low I go.

I'll try a bit of a workout today, but I have no idea if I can muster much at all.

Chip is proving to be a complicated case.  Vets are super reluctant to do his dental because of his HEART now.  Funny, that wasn't an issue and now it is -- nothing has changed.  But, he's smelling a bit better.  Maybe this was infection that's clearing up with the antibiotic.  Won't I have egg on my face?!?  I never regret advocating for a foster dog though.  He's getting another exam and labs on Monday and we'll see what's what.  The vet said he had a dental infection, not an upper respiratory infection.

He's looking a lot better and is starting to hang with us more.

This is how he started 10 days ago AFTER they cut the mats completely covering his eyes.  I won't show the horribly graphic pictures.

Anyway ...

The Will Smith memoire is too much.  Cut 50% -- easily.  I have no interest in knowing THAT much detail about all the things.  It's not the juicy stuff either.  The time he put his girlfriend's things on the lawn and burned them -- one page.  His apology -- one paragraph.  Recalling his first club experience -- 10 pages.  I hope it gets better once it gets to his TV days.  

Trader Joe's has some new prepared refrigerated meals.  I got the vegan shepherd's pie with cauliflower mash on top.  It was really good.  Enough for 2 meals.  I wish I bought more than one.  

That about all from here.  I have some chores and a couple of errands I pushed back from yesterday because of crazy storms.  Fingers crossed my energy starts to improve.  Stay well.  Later gators.

No Hair Day :(

I dodged a COVID bullet.  My hair dresser called yesterday afternoon to postpone my hair appointment today. Her husband has been sick for a few days and (after several negative tests), tested positive.  We wear masks for the appointment, but with Omicron, who knows if that would be enough.  So far, she's not symptomatic and is waiting for a test appointment (all out of rapid tests -- it was his LAST test).  Ugh.  It's everywhere.  Hello, gray roots.  She'll text me to reschedule.

The cleaning crew is back to full masks again -- that's good news since it protects them house to house.  We masked and left and sprayed.  This feels like winter of 2020.  

I moved my January dentist appointment out a month.  Hopefully by the end of February things will have burned through and be back to lower numbers.  I go every 3 months so I have wiggle room.

The outside run yesterday was impossibly hard -- another energy issue.  I had palpitations in the afternoon, but not as bad as they've been.  If it weren't for COVID, I'd see an urgent care for an EKG, just to make sure.  The palpitations WITH the low energy (and low workout energy) make me SLIGHTLY concerned about an arrhythmia.  If it doesn't improve or gets worse, I will have to venture into some medical place though.  I think they're unrelated -- just timing issue with the energy.  BTW, nothing when I exercise, just extremely low energy which could be many things.

I watched a webinar given by my life coach last night.  It was mainly a sales pitch (which she said), but I wanted to see her in action.  She did a good job and it was interesting to get to know her a little more.

I have an open-ish day since no hair appointment.  A few errands, one grocery shop (I went to TJ's yesterday) and that's about all.  Rain this afternoon so nothing outside (I thought about taking the dogs to the park once it warmed up).  

Workout is arms today and I'm keeping it simple.  Recovery.  Taking a slow roll this morning and that also feels good.

Hope you have a great day and stay well out there.  Later gators.

Random Wednesday Updates

Let's do a list ...

(1)  I've stopped taking Ashwagandha for a bit to see if it's causing heart palpitations (which can also be from peri menopause).  Already I'm sleeping less well -- big wake up time in the middle of the night again.  Dang.  I've been noticing the palpitations during the day and I had one day that it gave me pause.  Stay tuned ...

(2)  Coaching call was GOOD yesterday.  We talked about goals and such.  Fun call with some good coaching.  Maybe we're hitting our stride now.

(3)  New jacket alert lol.  Nordstroms.  It's so soft (not wool) and not as heavy as it looks.  I bought it for Asheville too since much more winter temps in the mountains.

(4)  Took Chip to my groomer yesterday.  Nails trimmed, foot pads trimmed and face shaved.  We stopped at that because he was getting upset.  He's walking around the house now and started drinking water (I had to mix water with his food because he wouldn't drink).  Bet he feels a little better.  He is desperate for a dental though -- poor baby.  Then we'll see him shine.  Don't get me started on the care from our intake vet -- shameful.

(5)  Outdoor run with Duke today.  Back to our typical 3 miles.  My energy is low this week -- could be several things.  Stopping the supplement which helps with menopause energy issues, stopping the desserts, eating back to normal portions and my hormones are wonky (night sweats and hot flashes) so crappy sleep.  I had the worse Peloton ride that I've ever had yesterday.  It was a class I've taken many times and I couldn't ride in range by the end.  Wonder what the run will feel like today.

(6)  Cleaning crew this morning.  Nervous about having them around with numbers through the roof, but the thought of me cleaning the house is too much (says my back).  We'll leave the house and air out and spray once they're finished.  

(7)  I started the Will Smith memoire.  It's co-authored.  Back in early childhood still.  I haven't read enough to have an opinion.

(8)  I desperately need to grocery shop, but energy is tanked.  Post holiday refrigerator is a waste land.  

Have a great day and stay well.  Later gators.

New Foster

Chip's here and settling in -- it's a replay of our last foster.  Mouth is a mess -- stinks to high heaven.  He needs to wait on his dental until his kidneys settle down.  Sweet as pie.  Ignores my dogs.  Sleeps more than anything.

His nails weren't trimmed and they're long and painful.  Trying to get him somewhere today.  WTF -- he was a week at our intake vet and no one checked his nails?!?  Exact same issue with Polly.

Post bath -- sitting by the fire getting warm and dry.

Today is life coaching day.  I had homework about new year goals, etc.  I plan to chat about those kind of things today.  I signed up for 20 minute session with the online coaching again.  I think I'll bring the day-to-day aggravations to them and the bigger stuff to her -- maybe ... still trying to find my stride with this new coaching.  And, I still wonder if she's good enough.  Perhaps she's a little greener than I thought to coach on a higher level.  Her price is certainly on a high level though.

Oh ... I did a thing -- a BIG THING.  Looking at the 22 list, I checked in on the Spanish online class that I've been eyeballing.  They have the first set of 6 week classes for 2022 so I signed up.  Sundays at 3:15.  Hour long online class (up to 5 people), homework, quizzes, tests -- the whole shebang.  It starts on January 23.  I'm so excited.  Why not take the plunge?  Guess Spanish class will be my first check-off.

The class time interferes with 2 months of bookclub though.  The other options were in the evening and that's not my best time.  I debated, but I was more excited about trying the Spanish class than 2 bookclub zoom calls.

I finished Group (bookclub selection).  It was interesting.  Very unusual therapy and some serious crazy life issues in the group.  Lots of strange sex disfunction.  Worth the read for an interesting perspective though.  Sharing is healing.  I'm looking forward to the podcast interview.

New book selection today.  I'm leaning toward the Will Smith memoire.  I have a pile up of non-fiction and I need to finish a couple of those before I buy more.

Fever blister is finally on the mend.  Those are so gross and uncomfortable.  I did it to myself by eating like crap.

That's all this morning.  Time to take the dogs out.  Have a good day and stay well.  Later gators.

22 for 2022 List

As usual, it's a hodgepodge of stuff. 

Big theme -- doing things with people.  Wonder why?!?!?  Even my little introverted self needs people things after a couple years of a pandemic.

Added the 3 things I regret missing from 2021 -- golf, sub 24 minute run and more bedroom time.

Always cooking something -- proper English roast with the fixings (namely Yorkshire Pudding).

Got to get the Little Free Library up and running.  

My predictions:

First thing -- already did it early.  Renew RN license.  Is this cheating a little?  It was on my draft list already.  Next first thing is Free Little Library because it's been bumped for so long.

Last thing -- Christmas lights on front porch because that happens in December.

Hardest thing -- toss between Spanish class and sub 24

Easiest thing -- fill out 5 year journal daily

Most fun -- garden to share

Least fun -- fill out recipe box

Most likely to NOT happen -- trip with Stacy or sub 24

My phrase to remember this year is "What if ..."  What if I do this?  What if I don't?  What will I become by stepping up?  This goes hand-in-hand with choose the bigger life (my birthday phrase).

Last year my phrase was "have my own back."

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I need to get moving this morning.  Big storms last night.  Lost power overnight.  Hubby coughing and snoring -- crappy sleep for me.  Lots to get ready for Chip to arrive today.  Fingers crossed it's an easy-ish transition.

Hope this first Monday of the new year is a good one for us all.  Stay well.  Later gators.

Happy 2022

We had a good day yesterday -- fun gifts, time together, food worked well.  Apple cake was okay, but I won't make it again.  I have better recipes for apple cake.  

Decorations coming down today.  Least favorite thing about The After Holiday. but life gets busier on Monday with a new foster so best get organized and ready.

After the clean-up its a chill day.  Reading, TV, left-overs -- not horrible way to spend another rainy day.

I started a 5 year daily journal.  Each page is one day with 5 entries.  You write a couple of thoughts every day and get to look back each year for the 5 years.  It requires constancy to be worth it and an entire year before it's fun to look back.  I'm up for it though.  Curious what to write -- today was a hodgepodge of thoughts.  Things I might be curious about what I was thinking when I look back -- kind of like a written time capsule.  

All my lists are finished -- recap for 2021, new things for 2022, future self thoughts.  I'm ready to start ... TOMORROW.  First the reentry day today with active getting ready for all-the-things tomorrow.  

Hello, January.  Glad to to be here.  Hope you had a good end and a have a good start -- here's to something better for us all.  Later gators.