Send in the Calvary

(BTW -- birthday was low-key and terrific!  Started my year off well.)

I heard from my coach, Holly and we're going to start coaching in July.  Not specifically Whole30 accountability, but that will be part of it.

After I finished the 2 coaching sessions last year (total of 6 months - one individual and one group), I wanted a break to see what I needed going forward.  The break was good -- but time to get back to moving forward.  Some of the slide was related to the EXTRA unexpected STUFF that happened since January.  Coaching could have helped.  I needed support in a different way than I get from family and friends.  I don't need therapy (as far as I can tell!!), but coaching is a life hack that helps me.  After trying both types, I like the individual better (all about ME!!).

Like therapy, finding a coach that matches your needs is one of the most important aspects.  Holly fits me (right now) and I'm glad to continue with her.  The calvary is on the way.  Just knowing that help is around the corner gives me hope and resolve (I know -- gag a little at this -- go ahead).  I hate to "need" this.  I hate to be all woo-woo.

There's a strong message out there -- everything that matters comes from inside YOU.  It's true.  Other people's opinions don't matter.  Happiness is a choice.  No one can do the work for you.  Etc.

Yet ...

There is nothing wrong about wanting (or needing) guidance, support, help.  Those messages are a conflict for me and that's why I've been resisting asking for help through this "hard" time.  I've also been resisting because my "hard" time is actually a lot of good stuff.  How can good be unsettling?  That fact is, it IS unsettling for me and telling myself I "should" feel differently doesn't help.

There you have it.  My crazy stretched out before you.

Birthdays get me thinking.  Big birthdays get me thinking more.  I want this year to be SOLID.  We have so many exciting things happening and I don't want to dull the shine because I don't have my crap together.  This is technically my 50th year of life, ending in my 50th birthday.  I want better, again.

For the first time in months, I feel focused.  It took me time, but I'm ready now.  Hard work ahead, but the hard feels good -- finally.  (P.S.  I'll be moaning and complaining -- some things don't change easily.  I can moan and still do the THING though.)

That's my philosophical thoughts this morning.  Shopping today with a friend -- fingers crossed for some good goodies.  Later gators.