First Phone Call

Okay - so here's the scoop.

The call was interesting.  Parts I really liked and connected with and some I didn't - what I expected. There's a lot for people who are new to anything healthy, so some of the stuff is very basic.  Jennifer acknowledged that though and my small group with Holly is a group that's a bit further in the healthy food and healthy movement basics (I think).

What I need is the healthy mindset stuff.  She started that conversation too in a very general way.  Everything can't happen minute one.  I'm happy she's strict on certain things - excuses, not doing the homework each week, not participating, etc.  Otherwise a big old group of women is going to run amuck in no time flat!  Tough leader is needed sometimes.

I think I'm getting my accountability partner assigned this week too.  That's the area I'm most unsure. I know I like Holly and I know a decent amount about PHB from the group chats, but I don't know the people in my group at all.  I need to trust it will be the very person I need (but I also hope we like each other, she's a good participant, etc, etc ... I'm greedy!)  There is already a partner I WANT ... but I need to trust the process and trust Holly when she pairs us.

The homework is hefty - and that's good.  I'm paying a lot for this program and I want to LEARN.

I have a few issues that are a bigger deal for me and some that I need to get over myself and participate.

 -- Weigh and measure - nope.  I gave that up long ago.
 -- Green morning drink which is a sugar-fruit bomb.  Also, nope.  Too much sweet for me.
 -- Fit bit challenges.  Ummm.  I have an apple watch which is far more accurate.  I don't want to be in the fit bit "hustles" ... I move and exercise well already.

And then there's the stuff that I need to put my big girl panties on and do what she says.

 -- Download a video to my phone "I am" affirmations.  I just started my OWN affirmations - ugh.
 -- Add Headspace meditation app on my phone.  Did it before, and it wasn't my thing AND I think I'm finally in a good meditation place.  I don't want to go backwards and I only have so much time I will dedicate to meditation, so which is more important?!?!

But, there's stuff I'm happy to do

 -- drink water with lemon and add collagen peptides
 -- do the journaling exercises
 -- breathing exercises called tactile breathing
 -- connect with our small groups
 -- be an active participant in the group chats (post, respond, share)
 -- there is another meditation class coming ... that sounds new and helpful!

I've oscillated between being honest and pretending -- especially in the beginning when I'm saying 'no' to so many things.  For example, if the task is to meditate with Headspace for 10 minutes, I can meditate MY WAY for 10 minutes, but say I used Headspace. I can say I'm drinking the green drink and maybe have it once in a while instead and EAT my greens with breakfast without the fruit component.  Pretending, but still participating.  I don't know.  I should be myself though - if not here, then where?  Maybe Holly will have a different take on some of this.

This is what I'm talking about regarding being further down the HEALTHY road.  I've passed some of these tasks already and I don't want to go backwards.  I have a long way to go in other areas though and that's where I'm ready to start at STEP ONE.

It's exciting!  Stay tuned ... later gators.