Hello (!!)

I've been MIA for a few days. Mornings got away from me and hormones are acting up so my energy is low right now.

My couple of weeks of ease have kind of gone by the wayside. Things filled fast and are continuing to fill up. Everything good, but my anxiety is knocking. Probably hormones adding to this feeling. 

Did I say 'yes' to too much? Maybe. Did I say 'yes' to things I are a wishy-washy 'yes' -- probably. Can I turn them into fun times -- also probably, if I clean up my attitude. Where have I heard this all before?!?!

I'm also knee neck-deep in mother problems as her visit looms. None of this is easy. I've chosen to not see her, but that's not bringing peace -- it's the most healthy of the 2 crappy options. I feel in a stead state of icky emotions and that's seeping into other areas. I'm trying to process and my mind spreads this to all areas of my life. 

All this to say, life feels hard right now and that's bumming me out a bit since my calendar says life should feel good. When I feel this way, I usually hibernate and that's not happening so I'm figuring out how to balance the good and the icky. Part of the solution is to give thought space to the good too -- I tend to ruminate on the bad and it overshadows and distorts what's good.

As far as the good goes ... 

Lots of family stuff with the kids over this next week. Gardening is coming along (still nervous about enough sun though). A few hikes next week -- Monday's is a challenge and I'm excited about it. Baking a fancy 30th birthday cake for my eldest (fingers crossed it turns out). Hosting some neighbors for a happy hour at the house. Maybe seeing my sister. High school zoom call for spring birthdays. Good stuff.

That's all from here. Here's a picture of a new little creamer with some propagated clippings from a dying plant. Maybe she'll like the water better than the soil. Later gators.