Unexpected News

Well, what a night last night.

We knew this was coming, just not so soon.  Hubby is unemployed starting in June.  It was a management transition with the writing on the wall for about a year.

He's well taken care of and nothing changes about our move decision (i.e. no regrets).  This was all part of the consideration in the do-we-move decision.

Still -- it's a slap.

This is HEAVILY testing my new beliefs.  Just to remind us (ME) ...

Accept what is.
How do I know it's suppose to happen? Because it did.
The Universe works for me, not against me.
When things look like they are falling apart, they are usually coming together.
Embrace UNCERTAINTY.
Live with abundance (not scarcity).
Trust the timing.

Dang.  I thought the move was my big test (final exam).  Guess it's only a mid-term.

The biggest issue for me ... UNCERTAINTY.

Hubby said what I believe too.  We can look at this as a great situation or a crappy situation.  OUR CHOICE and when you look at the details -- it's a win for us.  A win that has to move through UNCERTAINTY first and that's the catch for me.

There's some interesting opportunity in this change.  I'm sure I'll elaborate more on this as it goes along.  For a long time, I think our relationship could use some more honesty on my part.  Case in point -- he doesn't know I journal here.  It's my secret.  It shouldn't be.  I casually mention meditation, but don't talk about it with him.  He knows very little of my life coaching experience.  Since we will be spending a lot of time together starting SOON, it's a chance to show him more of my morning routine, etc.  Show him the parts that I've kept quiet about because it feels too personal, too different.

It will test our personal space a lot.  This test is good.  Heading into next stages of life, we get to trial retirement and see what that will look like and it will help us make that decision when it's the right time.

Another interesting thing -- I knew yesterday this was happening.  He had the meeting scheduled and I had the thought -- this is it tonight.  I waited up for him to finish the late dinner meeting.  The first thing I said when I answered his call was "what happened at the meeting?"  I had asked if there was any concern with this meeting last week.  It was pinging my gut all over the place.  I kept trying to talk myself out of the feeling -- I'm stressed and looking for something "bad" to happen.  That's all, reading too much into things.  But I didn't.  More and more I'm trusting my gut.

My gut says this is all good.  My brain is panicking with the uncertainty.  It wants to know, needs to know ... is everything going to be okay, what's going to happen, where will we be in a year?  My gut knows it's not only fine, but it's good.  I need to quiet my brain.  Hello, meditation.

That's all I have time to write this morning.  I'll be checking in sporadically this week as the move is at the NOW point.

What a week.
What a year.
2019 had a huge make-over and it looks nothing like I expected it to look.  Life is an adventure?!?!?