Hump Day Updates

I did something I've NEVER done before ... cancelled my hair appointment.  I need to work on my mental health (aka funky mood) and an early appointment wouldn't allow a solid morning routine.  The appointment has been changed twice already, so I decided why not a third time.

Do I feel a smidge guilty this morning?  Maybe, but I am super grateful for a slow roll morning where I can DO my things.  I think this week is a solid dose of PMS meets pandemic and I couldn't muster a rushed morning along side an outing that requires being focused and careful for 2 hours.

I also have an evening Tarot Card reading and (once again) that bulks up my morning and my evening with a big expanse of NOTHING all day.

Anyway, the decision was made and that's that.  Choosing ME today.  (P.S. Remember when hair appointments were fun??)

Life Coaching was great.  Comforting to know I'm not alone with this rollercoaster of emotions -- even though I'm not faced with any tragedy or hardship.  Holly had a few insights after we talked.

(1) Why am I having trouble building a new routine during this time?  I have a belief that my hubby is going to quit work soon and I'll have to redo everything anyway.  Yep.  This has been on my mind because I am also holding a belief that the work I did over these last 2 years was for nothing too -- since so much of it has gone away.  I'm subconsciously fighting settling into something new, doing the work, find happy that will go away again.

(2) Why is having FUN so important and so hard to find?  I need fun to help with "carrying" some emotional weight from some family situations -- something to bring up my energy vibration, but that very weight is what makes HAVING FUN hard to find.

Awareness is half the battle.  Now to find some fixes.  It took an hour of talking and until those insights so I have homework to work on my beliefs.  There were a few other things we talked about -- things with no solutions, but value having an understanding ear to listen.  Loss of connections, anger about the lack of collective cooperation, etc.

I read a little of The Guest List (Lucy Foley).  I have a hard time reading when I'm in a mood.  My mind "thinks" over the words I'm reading -- I can read a few pages and have no idea what I read.  

I'll chat about the Tarot Card reading tomorrow.  This should be FUN!  

Lots of self-care time this morning.  Cold shower, workout, meditation, journaling -- but, first, dog walk.  Have a happy day.  Stay well.