Let's Chat BLUE

I have a BLUE happiness hangover. 

A day of hope 💙

We had "that" lunch I talked about and it was a CELEBRATION.

See, it was a good idea. 

We were a little obnoxious about toasting all the good things, but who cares.

Lunch was at a minority run, local restaurant and they were celebrating too. 

I lit our outside lights blue (still this morning too -- let's not cut the joy short). 

Blue pedicure. Couldn't be another choice yesterday.

I was on my phone in one manner or another for probably the most I've ever been on my phone in one day. Record breaking scrolling, hah. Up at 3am, bed at 9. I had to charge my phone twice before bed. Worth it and I didn't care -- scroll away. No record breaking today, but I'm still enjoying scrolling the memes. 

Okay, in other updates:

Car in the shop. Loaner for the next possible week. They'll let me know more today. It was supposed to be a 2 hour appointment. Guess they have no idea how to fix it. 

Hike canceled because of the rain. Granite rocks and wet don't play nicely. 

Massage this afternoon. This'll feel good. 

I need the day to get caught up. Celebrating the kids' 30th birthdays on Sunday and I have work to do. Baking a GF cake (my DIL is strictly GF). I'm making the same one I made for my other DIL because it was so good (the birthday kids were out of town so it'll be new to them) and it's one of the few cakes I can make GF that pleases all tastes. It's our anniversary on Saturday too. Lots of celebrations this weekend. Lots of work too.

A little update on the threesome outing for everyone curious (aka no one lol). 

I went into it with a good attitude. 

BE MYSELF.

I will morph (or be tempted to) if I'm the odd one out in a group of three and it feels uncomfortable.

I was the odd one in a number of ways. And I also wasn't in a number of ways. 

I stayed myself through it all.

Found out my neighbor who I have become friendly with (not the newest one) believes all medicine is a scam. No doctors, no preventative care, no vaccines, no nothing. Holy cow. That was a SHOCK. (Didn't feel compelled to morph on that insanity.) It was a shock to my other neighbor too who pushed back on her rant about how we're being scammed. 

This is the reason our friend passed in the spring. He felt the same way. Dead from a preventable heart attack. No care. Ignored massive, frequent warning signs for weeks before he died. 

She's playing with the same fire. 

And I wonder if there are other "theories" too.

Geez. 

It does bring me to something I've been thinking about lately. 

Can I have a level of friendship with people who I clash on these kind of things?

Can I let a friend be fundamentally different?

Where is the line that what we disagree on is a dealbreaker?

I realized I have a couple of friends who probably extend a pass to me. I'm not religious and they are (the kind, inclusive religious). This is a major difference that holds an extremely important life value for them, and yet, they ARE friends with me. I believe in a higher power, but not church. They believe in God, Jesus, church, but they know I don't share the same belief. It probably limits our friendship.

Her belief about medicine likely roots somewhere in mental health or childhood trauma or fear. She's not completely wrong. Medicine CAN be a scam. But at this level, it's a conspiracy theory and potentially damaging. She also didn't mince words telling me that medical people are part of the scam. Ouch. 

It's why I say this is rooted in something bigger -- her reaction was STRONG. She came out fighting. She wouldn't concede others make different choices (those choices were part of the scam, according to her). I told her a colonoscopy saved my life. She disagreed. Ouch again. 

I don't think this means we aren't friends, but it does mean our friendship will only go so far and I'm more cautious now. Something to overthink think about.

Okay, I've rambled long enough. 

Time to scroll (haha, sort of kidding). 

Have a good one.

Later gators. 

Blunami !!!!!!!!

It's a joyful morning. 

Blue wave was strong and far reaching. 

I love that GA showed up this election, but holly cow, TX!!!! She stunned the country. 

It's 8am -- I've been up since 3am basking in the glory. So much texting, scrolling, news watching that I already need to charge my phone. 

Have the best BLUE day today.

Later gators. 

Threesome Day

Lots of chores off my plate.

A few followups today.

Eat the frog first.

I got vaccinated yesterday -- flu and covid. Feeling a little blah this morning, but glad to have them in my system ahead of travel. I waited until after the big hikes.

Donated a big basket of arugula to the food bank. It's growing like crazy right now.

Using my new calendar strategy, I added some things that I really wanted to do, said no to some things, punted some things to January (already at that point in the year). 

I'm grateful to be asked and I don't take that for granted, but I'm more selective now. 

November is already slim pickings. We have a trip to Hilton Head, company in Asheville for a weekend, Thanksgiving. This leaves little time as the first full week is underway. Then we leave for Paris in the beginning of December. 

(Honest to god -- STOP traveling in November and December. Do I listen to myself? Nope. It always feels manageable 6 months away. I somehow forget about decorating, cooking, gift shopping, etc. Good enough has to be the theme this year.)

I wonder if trying these new strategies over the holiday months is akin to starting a diet during the holiday months. Probably not the most effective, but maybe helps a bit.

I cannot tell you how freeing it felt to say no to a few things that were simply too much for my schedule and my desire to do them. Too much work on my end. I think one of the invites was just so I could do the favor of hosting in Asheville. Big weight off my shoulders -- no 'yes' with conditions, no wishy-washy 'no,' and absolutely no 'maybe.' Simple and direct 'no thank you and thanks for the invitation' kind of response. Fantastic. Done. 

I've been using 'no' more with people I expect the 'yes' to become inconvenient for me. You plan it now (even though it wasn't my invite). You execute it (aka drive). You adjust it (to their changing schedule). 

This leaves room for 'yes' with people that don't do that and our time together feels easy and relaxed.

Okay, I'm beating a dead horse on this one, as usual. 

I hope you have a good day.

I'm heading out on the threesome for the day. While it'll be nice, it's a 'yes' that morphed. (Not all morphing is bad and I'm reluctantly flexible a lot more than I'd like, but things rarely seem to morph into something BETTER for ME. I've been paying attention incase I'm not noticing when it IS better for me ... but nope, it's rare.)

Later gators. 

P.S. I have been noticing "dear diary" pictures, but not been in the position to take the picture. Driving. Hiking with the group. That kind of thing. It's still fun to do. 

Phew, It was Hard!

This hike was a lot harder. 

Every little bit of me is sore. 

But finished with no problem. One hiker had an issue keeping up so she's going to need to qualify before she gets at this hike level with the club again. Another hike leader stayed back with her for most of the hike. 

I'm taking a complete day off from working out. Even my arms are sore. 

The views were beautiful and the trails had vibrant red and orange trees. No pictures though -- phone was in my backpack in a plastic bag. Two of the hikers collect leaves for an art project because they were that special.

Rain held off, but threatened the entire time. The wind was brutal. Only down branches, no trees. The entire hike is on the AT and it's well maintained and marked (which is nice with leaves covering the path).

The last 15 miles of the drive was mountain road with crazy turns and switchbacks. Dang. Steep and leaf covered too. Yesterday was an adventure. 

I'm proud for making this a goal.

Proud that I completed it. 

Proud that I did BOTH hikes.

Proud that I drove the crazy drive.

Proud I found the trailhead. 

Lots of FS things to notice and appreciate. 

It's Monday and the first Monday of the month -- 5 Mondays in November. 

It feels like opportunity, for some reason. Clean slate. Holidays begin. Weather better. 

(Reminds me I need to revisit the 26 for 2026 list and start keeping notes for next year's list.)

With summer staying an extra month, the end of the year is so close you can touch it.

My week isn't planned well, but I managed a "no" that frees up a little bit of time. It's a good week -- only a few chores, but it's too much with people and too much of me driving the plans again. 

I've started using the idea of "good enough" as another way to tackle my calendar woes. 

It's not a new concept, but I overheard it on last week's hike and it struck a chord. They were talking about it in relationship to work-life balance, but I can absolutely apply it to my situation.

I did it yesterday. Kids over for football and I had the hike. Left EVERYTHING up to everyone else. No cooking. No food planning. No toy setup. I came home around 4 o'clock, got to play with my grandson which is the best part, and didn't even help cleanup. 

Hubby wanted to sell something on Marketplace and I told him to use his account. I didn't need to be the middle person and manage it. He sold the sports stuff yesterday and there were so many questions -- see?? No need for my involvement. 

Good enough. 

I'm taking things down a notch or two. Doing just enough and letting others pick up the slack (do some work too). No need for me to do it all. Wonder if I can use it this week?

A friend reached out to get together. I gave her dates. She responded "let me know some ideas and we can lock it in." What?? Why am I planning this now? I'll put out a couple of basic ideas and punt decisions back to her. Good enough.

I'm applying this to the holidays too. They'll be good enough so that I have time to enjoy it too. I have a big no for a birthday party. December 23 -- costume party (not Christmas themed). I can't do it. Just the party? Okay. Party with an elaborate costume the evening before I host the holiday -- nope. 

Anyway, should be light soon and I can get to the chore list -- starting with a food bank garden donation. Today is "that" kind of day, but I'll be happy to have the work finished.

Hope you're set for this month -- we're cruising to the finish line of 2026.

Have a great Monday.

Later gators.

Threesomes

GM. Best night of the year -- I LOVE the "fall back" weekend. Nothing like an extra hour of sleep that doesn't take from your morning.

I'm up early for the hardest of the 2 BIG hikes. 

Rain expected.

No rain expected.

Now rain expected (actually raining).

I have no idea if she'll cancel. It'll depend on the trail conditions when wet. People dropped the hike last night (probably because of the weather forecast). It's a wait and see.

I might need to reevaluate shoe choice too because of blisters and wet socks. I don't have waterproof hiking gear because I only do day hiking. 

Little recap:

Fun halloween event with my grandson. 

Dinner with the kids. 

Kids picked me up and treated -- felt like I a granny moment where I had to do nothing!!!! More of this, please.

Yesterday was a relaxing day. We ended up walking to coffee at the same time both our new neighbors were walking to the farmers market and one couple to breakfast. Met in the street for a chat.

Then I saw the newest neighbor again later in the morning. We stood by my fence and she asked about a political sign (she voted in her old town because of timing so didn't know the candidate). I said democrat and she said she was so relieved. 

We were both worried about each other and our political views. They've been discussing us -- are we, aren't we?!? We did the same.

Both her kids are gay so this is also personal for them. What a relief. We were both being cautious and a little standoff-ish. It's why she moved -- wanted a more liberal area where people didn't vote against the rights of her children. 

She didn't notice the pride sign next to the political sign. 

Our town leans liberal, but not everyone (of course). 

Now she's joining me and my other neighbor in the city on Tuesday. (I'm driving AGAIN, no one else likes to drive in the city). My other neighbor suggested it and I'm happy to have her along.

This makes us a threesome. 

It's my third threesome group of friends that developed this year. 

I don't know how I feel about this. Traditionally, I don't like it. It's how feelings get hurt. Plans become complicated. Someone becomes the "extra." Two is perfect. A group is different. Three is its own thing.

Of course, in mature friendships, with emotional mature people, this shouldn't be a problem. I guess the question is, am I mature enough to handle if I end up the extra in these groups? Especially this neighborhood group where you can notice people come and go. I also know they have much more in common with each other and most likely will become fast friends. 

I'd like to think I can handle it these days without getting jealous or my feelings hurt or competitive. I guess it's another wait and see -- and get coached hah!

I need to remember to show up as MYSELF and not mold to fit in with their interests, etc for the sake of being friends. I don't NEED new friends. Our relationships will develop as they develop -- organically and honestly. 

P.S. I am happy about it in a lot of ways too. I like the idea of more couple friends and bumping into them for spontaneous plans. 

Okay, time to pack up. Need to make a hike lunch for the picnic at the summit -- one of my favorite things to do on a hike even though I don't eat much since there's still a lot of hiking left. It's a romanticized moment that lives up to the hype.

Happy November ... eeek.

Later gators.

Gretchen Rubin Tidbits -- You're Welcome

Remember the meditation "message" this week? This was the page I read in a poetry book last night. 

Synchronicity.

From the last used bookstore visit

I "Gretchen Rubin-ed" my nightstand. GR has a few practical recommendations I use regularly. You will find them so helpful too. 

(1) Do something about regular annoyances, don't just tolerate them. It makes a big difference in your daily experience. 

I put my glasses on my nightstand when I turn out the light. 

50% of the time I knock them off in the morning reaching for them.

25% of the time I can't find them and I have to sit up, turn on the light.

A very low success rate of reaching for my glasses when I wake up. 

So I finally did something about it.

Decorative bowl next to the books and my phone (couldn't be easier). Done. 

Glasses in the bowl. Doesn't fall off. Easily reachable.

Worked perfectly this morning. 

(2) When you can't find something, it's most often exactly where you think it is, you didn't look hard enough. 

Happened yesterday. I couldn't find my iPods after the trip to Asheville. I knew the electronic pouch I use for the trip was the most likely place, but they weren't there. Except, they were. Once I looked in other places, I returned to where I expected them to be and, sure enough, they were under another electronic item. 

(3) When you leave a place (restaurant seat, train seat, etc.) always look back. Best way to not leave something behind. It's amazing how many times I left my book, water bottle, sweater, etc. 

This is hubby's favorite. Saved him many times when traveling. 

An update from yesterday, about "old" ladies. 

The woman who was giving me the most confusion about going to lunch on Wednesday, sent a text to a couple of us. "Let's just go to lunch on Wednesday." She's going to bring it up at the coffee today.

Honest to god. I said the EXACT same thing ... over and over. Now it's somehow her idea, not mine. Whatever. I didn't do it for the glory (hahaha). Lunch it is -- with a bunch of old ladies!!!!

Duke and I ran yesterday. He had such a good time. 

I was supposed to pick up my grandson, confirmed in the morning on a text to both parents. Yep. All set. 

Except he wasn't at school. They "forgot" my DIL was off from work. Geez, BUT MY SON CONFIRMED THAT MORNING!!!

I set up for him. Got snacks ready. Reserved the afternoon. 

My DIL didn't notice the text until later and let me know.

I'm not loving this week's theme -- ready to start another week and roll the dice with a new one. 

I'm looking forward to today. Easy day with fun people and fun plans.

Friday coffee meeting with a lunch plan announcement 😁

Lunch with a friend at a new GF Mexican restaurant in the next town over. 

Halloween parade at my grandson's school. I confirmed again yesterday. 

Hubby comes home late tonight. I'll have the evening to myself unless I get a dinner invite from the kids. 

NOTHING on the calendar for tomorrow and I'm so happy. Spend some time with hubby. Relax. Read. 

I'm getting the fall itch to get back to creative things. I'm ready to paint rocks. Ready for a couple of crafty projects. Stay tuned. 

Best get moving. I'm on Duke walking duty this morning again. 

Have a great Friday.

Later gators. 

Old Ladies?

Spoiler alert -- I had to plan the day. 

Good thing I looked up options for parking and lunch. 

No one did anything. 

It was good that I drove though. The woman who parked in my driveway couldn't back out. Ran over the grass over and over, almost hit the utility pole. Eeeek. It was awful. So awful, my husband texted me because of the camera alerts. She kept turning the wrong way. No exaggeration -- about 10 times. Wrong every time. She finally just chanced it and ran over everything to get out. I was just walking to help her when she pulled out over the grass and bushes. It wouldn't have been safe for her to drive in the city. She's only in her 60s -- I don't get it.

The Margaret Mitchell House was interesting. Obviously controversial with the black rights (or lack of rights) during that time. The museum tried to balance the perspective from the black community. Gone With the Wind was the first saga novel I read (actually read it twice as a teenager). It's so problematic, I know I wouldn't enjoy it now (maybe that's good news, growth, education).

Even with everything, the history of the novel and the movie was fascinating. 

We went to Mary Mac's for lunch. Iconic southern restaurant in Atlanta where we had the rehearsal dinner for the wedding a couple of years ago. I got the meatloaf. I don't eat meat often, but this is an absolute favorite classic. 

Sweet potato, collards, meatloaf

I dropped another garden donation to the food bank first thing.

Fresh and beautiful colors

A little chat about aging ... specifically aging women. 

The driving thing is a THING. Does it become that hard or do women stop wanting to drive and then they can't? I don't want to age that way. It's happening to women my age too. About half of my friends won't drive downtown, or certain highways, or long distances, or places they aren't familiar. The ones who do drive are left to do all the driving -- and apparently the planning too. This is part of why I get my panties in a bunch over driving -- driving means doing all the work of figuring out timing, parking, logistics. They absolve themselves of everything if they're not behind the wheel.

Another odd story involving women  ...

I asked our group if they wanted to get lunch on Wednesday after the election to just be together. I asked it at our Friday meeting -- brought it up 2 weeks in a row. 

It's like clucking hens. 

We may not know the results. 

It might be a run-off. 

We might lose. We might win. 

Yes to all of it. The point is to get together after a stressful night and long election. Just a little local lunch invite. I explained this multiple times and no one can wrap their heads around it. 

IT'S JUST LUNCH (!!!)

Should we wait and do a party?

Should we only do it if we win?

Should we wait until they take office?

I mean, seriously, WTH?? Why is this hard to understand? I finally said, if no one is interested in lunch, I'll make other plans. The response ... well, we won't know if we should go or not until that morning. And then they circle around to all the same points again.

I can't make this up. 

Every single time I bring it up, I explain it, and they act like they can't understand my words. 

If I had simply said, who wants to go to lunch next week, they'd give me an answer and that would be that.

These women are in their 50s, 60s, and one just turned 70. Why are they like this? There was one younger woman the first week when mentioned it who understood (not able to go) and reiterated the explanation to everyone. She got the same response. So it's not me speaking gibberish or being unclear. 

Lord help us. I want to take a poll -- who of these women are on HRT and who are not. I wonder if this is the line that gets drawn. I'm starting to pay attention. What makes some women *this* way and others not? It's like brains and abilities go to mush. 

It's that way with walking too. We walked to lunch -- a mile from the museum. We all agreed and happily walked on a beautiful day. They were tired at the end of the walk. They had trouble with the rolling (little) hills. They were breathy. We walked slowly and easily. 

Are they letting themselves become old?

I hope it's a choice or I'll feel doomed to age that way too.

On that note, I'm going to run at the park with Duke this morning. Sweet boy needs some fun too and I wasn't in the mood to hike the mountain. Not sure why, but my gut was pinging to not go. My ankle is wonky and I'm worried about stressing it before the next (even bigger) hike on Sunday.

P.S. During meditation yesterday, I asked for help with decisions. 

The answer: listen to your body. 

It always has the answer before your mind takes over. 

This morning I'm listening. 

Have a good day.

Later gators.