Friendship and A New Word

I have 2 "revelations" to chat about this morning. 

Up first ... a prickly bit. 

Remember the friendship I realized I needed to back off? I saw her last week (we had something scheduled already) and we had a great time. Laughed, chatted ... not one bit of any issue. AND I didn't think that meant everything was okay again. I was solid in my decision.

I saw her yesterday in our group dynamic and her other side came to play. Unkind comments. Rude. Aggressive. 

The revelation: I experienced both sides again, and it reenforces how much we aren't a friendship match. I will continue to see her AND (here's the best part) it doesn't bother me. The unkind bits yesterday washed over me. The fun time last week didn't entice me. 

Why? 

Because I'm no longer pursuing a friendship. I'm not trying to get "us" back. We'll see each other socially and that's fine. I'm not taking her personally, nor am I rolling over. 

I edited myself as I said I would. Didn't share things because I don't want her joining in that part of my life. Quiet boundaries up and functioning. 

There's still some disappointment lingering when I see her -- I really wanted a closer friendship. I really like her happy side. 

And I'm proud of my growth. I've learned enough to know it's not possible and I stopped myself before I spent way too long trying to make the impossible work. It's where it is and I'm not putting energy or mental anguish into it anymore. 

And I don't have to "cancel" her in my life. She's around and sometimes it's great and sometimes it's not. We have a history and a relationship and a shared friend circle, but boundaries are protecting me. 

I imagine we'll see each other a lot less now that I'm not pursuing her. It seems she's found her next honeymoon friend from our group. This is her pattern. 

Progress. 

Yeah, ME. 

Second revelation is more fun. 

I've found my new motto for 2026 (word, phrase, or some combo). 

Last year I had a motto (The Little Blue House) 

AND a word (COLOR). 

I hadn't had a word in several years. 

This year, looks like it's JUST a word. 

Drumroll ....

SPACE

I hiked solo for a while before the group hike yesterday and thought about what's the essence of my focus next year.

I like what I'm doing and I like that focus still. 

Feels like there's more room to grow in The Little Blue House way. 

Still feels exciting. 

I actually thought about not changing it. 

But ...

I asked if there was anything that needed an adjustment. 

A little change.

A little improvement. 

Yep ...

I want to be more intentional with the little things. 

Little is where the magic happens (for me). 

Little is the icing on the cake.

The glitter (thanks, Chat).

And, that requires deliberate space. 

Heading to coffee.

I want SPACE to walk to the coffee shop (not drive).

SPACE to chat with people (linger a minute).

Bookclub.

Space to share my garden (takes time and effort).

Space to come up with new ideas (quiet times).

Wrapping a gift.

Space to be creative.

Space to write a nice card. 

Anyway, you get the idea. 

SPACE feels better than TIME. 

It feels more intentional. 

Holds a different meaning for me.

AND, I'm working on the SPACE in my house so it feels like me.

AND, I want a seat at the table too -- take up SPACE,

AND, I care about my body SPACE -- fitness, health. 

It works on multiple levels and that's when I knew it was the one.

BTW, speaking of house space, I got this book from the library and promptly bought it on Amazon ($10). It's really helpful, no matter your personal style. Excellent ideas. Worth revisiting as I decorate.

Today is the hardest day before vacation. I've been baking cookies as I chat this morning. "Work" started at 4:30 and I still don't know if I'll get everything finished. Some things might be pushed for an early morning tomorrow. I didn't do a great job with my list distribution -- or SPACE, for that matter. 

I can do better for myself. 

Have a good day. Later gators.

P.S. Just realized I want SPACE from that friendship too. This word is working for me. 

Creativity Comes When it Comes

I'm cruising through my to-do lists, but life likes to ADD, so in the worst timely time, I had a burst of creativity around fixing my bedroom and a problem with the front door. 

I've been trying to fix both and the ideas weren't coming or were duds. 

Then inspiration at the most crowded of times. 

The front door problem:

The door is mainly glass and it gives a bird's eye look into the house.

But, we want to be able to see out during the day.

A shade will be too bulky to cover the entire length of the glass.

Frosting will block the view out the door when we want it. 

Enter a portiere -- curtain covering an entryway. Vintage problem solver for drafts.

Behold the front door fix ...

The pictures don't do it justice. It looks so pretty -- closed and opened. Opened, it softens the hallway and looks so cozy. Closed, it looks so nice from the outside -- decorative and soft on the front door glass.

Inexpensive curtains and rod. I can't believe how well it works. 

This is in the entryway ... an antique ornament from my great aunt (my aunt gifted it to me last week).

Next up ... the bedroom. 

What's the problem, you ask?

That. 

I don't really know. 

I know it's wrong and not cozy and not me and not working. 

One of many problems that suddenly occurred to me yesterday:

It's too crowded (with the wrong things).

Took out a sofa table and moved it to the basement. 

It looks very nice here.
It's a beautiful drop-leaf.

Another problem:

THE RUG.

Broke down and ordered a rug from Anthropology. 

It's a bit of a color risk. But I'm taking the risk and building the room around it. 

Fingers crossed because no easy return option. 

Once the rug is set, I'll build the room around it. 

It needs color. 

It needs whimsy.

It needs character.

The room is dark (and boring). 

I like a "happy" and bright bedroom. 

Lights off, shutters closed and it's fine for sleeping. 

During the day, sitting in bed reading ... I need happy, fun, pretty.

It feels good to move forward on the bedroom. Not as easy of a fix as the front door and A LOT more expensive, but it's important to me. I've tried, really tried, to like it. 

I'll be decorating in layers. 

Rug.

Bed.

Walls.

Reupholster an antique chair.

Once I get the rug (and love it), I'll relax into decorating and have some fun with it. 

Anyway ...

I tried a new-to-me Korean cafe a few blocks from me. It's delightful and delicious. Opened about a year and off the beaten path. It's going to be a new favorite.

Happy.

Inclusive signs.

Inclusive for food sensitivities too.

Friendly.

The silverware alone!
Gorgeous.
Bowl was outstanding.

Cute. Immediately googled.
ETSY.

Colorful.
Creative.

Charred tea with coconut milk.
It was really good, not sweet.

I'm hiking with the Tuesday group today and I need to drop an attitude.

 

The time got pushed back last minute because of the temperature and it's stupid. It'll be in the high 30s moving very quickly to the 40s. Big girl panties, ladies. This puts pressure on my afternoon timing (the reason I'm annoyed). This temperature has been in the forecast for about a week.

I haven't hiked with them in weeks. I can't hike again until December. And, I'll probably have a good time. And, and, and ... let it go (I'm trying and failing).

But, dang, it's ALWAYS something with this group. Group dynamics without consideration to the group.

Change hike.

Change time.

Change distance.

Change pace.

Change lunch.

Be late. 

Always because ONE person wants it to be different and ALWAYS last minute. Never when the plans are set the week before.

But I'm the outlier who cares ... so it's a ME problem, not a THEM problem. That's why I'm hiking with them infrequently these days. It's not the match it used to be. 

Okay, I've chatted long enough and the rant is getting me going in the wrong way. Hope you have a good day. Later gators.

Love Language

Top bookclub meeting yesterday. 

Thank you, Priya Parker and the Magic Question gathering. 

Re-read a childhood favorite book and discuss. 

Everyone was interested in what everyone picked (we kept it a secret). 

Everyone loved thinking about what they read in childhood and why.

Everyone enjoyed re-visiting the book as an adult. 

The conversation was a banger and we talked for almost 3 hours (could've gone longer). It was most excellent. So, so, so good. 

It was so interesting to folks, we had 5 people come (one dropped at the last minute). This is a big group for this Little Engine Bookclub. 

Thank you Priya Parker. 

First freeze of the season so I shared my garden with bookclub. Not sure what will survive these few days.

New love language category:

Garden Sharing (both ways). It's a delight that never seems to get old. I picked beautiful Thai basil that has purple flowers and put them in spice jars for everyone plus a big bag of salad greens. And, if you share your garden with me, we're friends for life. 

This is the garden this morning. Wind and low temps. Eeeek. 

Covers blew off.
Temps are above freezing
since the sun came up.

These next 3 days are turn and burn kind of days. Jam packed ahead of vacation. So many balls in the air. Tackling one thing at a time and leaning heavily on to-do lists for each day. 

It's a Monday. My favorite day of the week. Hope you're set for a good week and a good Monday. Later gators. 

The Race, A Change in Plans, A Windstorm,

The next two days are shifting ...

But, first, the car race. 

I enjoyed it -- much more than I expected. Marking our calendar to go again next year. It's not a spectator race, so we were part of the crew entrance. There was a weather hold and my BIL's car broke, but we hung out, watched other races once the storm passed. Met people. Festive group. Lots of laughs. No crowds. 

Couldn't get it to start.
Parts ordered, but not in time
for the races this weekend.

I packed a fancy picnic and it got knocked on the ground.

Goodbye, fancy picnic. 

So I ate chocolate for lunch.

It was an oddly ill-fated day that was still a lot of fun. 

We joked about a curse. 

Now the shift ...

It's a bit of a long story, but we were meeting the kids at a park this morning --  no football. Hubby had playoffs for pickleball and I have bookclub. Pickleball got canceled and now kids are over all day for football (from 11-7).

Of course, I LOVE getting to hang out with my grandson, but now I'm losing late morning, late afternoon and evening to truck playing. Don't get me wrong, it's fabulous ... but I scheduled that time for things I need to get finished ahead of our trip and a little quiet time for me. I'll be gone for a few hours at bookclub (while he naps, as it turns out). 

I wish we had stuck to the original plan. 

Park and breakfast was perfect ... fun for all and easy for me. 

My morning is now figuring out food for a day of football and squeezing in a couple of errands. 

Rush, rush, rush before bookclub. Dang. 

Monday changed too. A weather front is coming in with high winds and heavy gusts. The afternoon mountain hike is at a national park that hasn't had trail maintenance since the shutdown. There will be trees and large branches down and I'm not taking a chance. I never like dangerous. 

This opens up the afternoon so I guess I can shift some of today to tomorrow. 

Trying to keep my mind in a good place. When my schedule is this tight, I need everyone and everything to hold steady and be (do) what they say. I need to CONTROL the world and the world never listens.

It's got a lot of nerve. 

The weather is a bugger too.

FIRST FREEZE tonight.

Eeek, my garden. 

My outdoor pots.

My redneck garden cover of old sheets will struggle against the wind storm.

Can I go with the flow?

I have no choice.

Can I go with the flow with ease?

Probably not, but I'm trying. 

Have a good Sunday. I'm determined to -- because it's all good things. There's no excuse for anything less from me, given the suffering happening everywhere. I'm lucky and privileged. I know it and I need to remember it. It's never a chore to make time to help. 

I'll leave it at this before I get going on the suffering and those who do so much and those who do so little.

Later gators.

P.S. On a growth note, haven't complained once about bookclub. 6 scheduled. I think 3 will come. Doesn't phase me this month. Progress (at least this month).

Goldilocks

We had a really nice anniversary. 

Better than #32 when we forgot until the afternoon.

However, I'm dissecting the day ... looking for the goldilocks "just right."

We had parts of the day that were excellent. 

Stopped by a local coffee shop and picked up a mayoral sign for the runoff election. 

Then a drive inside the perimeter to volunteer for a few hours packing for a food market. Met a number of wonderful people doing really good work in the community. 

Cooler in a warehouse.
Very interesting to see
behind the scenes.

Home for a late, quick lunch at our local cafe. 

Met new neighbors renting the house across the street. Moving truck arrives on Monday. Relocated from out of state. We talked for quite a while. It'll be nice to have them on the street.

Took Duke on a long exploratory walk in the area. I found a Korean cafe that's on my list to try asap. You see everything differently when you walk.

Trip to Whole Foods for food for today. Doing a "fancy" little picnic spread to make it festive.

Excellent.

And busy.

Wouldn't change a thing.

Then dinner out with friends. This is where I needed to be more discerning. 

Should have planned another night.

Should have suggested different restaurant choices. (They ask us for options and then they pick.)

We had a good night, but we were tired and a night in would've been welcomed. And, why did I suggest the last restaurant (of course they picked that one)? Totally on me. I didn't want to go there. I didn't think they'd pick that one. What was I thinking?

I talked myself into continuing the yeses for the day and that's was a mistake. 

Not a horrible mistake. 

It was fun.

We walked on a beautiful evening. 

Shared tapas were good, but I couldn't eat many of the choices and had to share the ones I could eat. 

Late dinner, late night. 

The reason I'm rehashing the day is because I KNEW it should've been a pass, and I didn't listen to my body's reaction. I overrode it with my brain. My body said no -- I remember the feeling. The busy day needed a balance of a quiet evening. I'm on a stretch of a full calendar and space is even more important.

Coaching is teaching me to pay attention to the my body's reaction and trust it. My body knows me.

This is why the dissection this morning ... learning the nuances. Another day, the dinner would've been the strong yes of the day.

Busy/full can be "just right" if it's a busy/full that works for that moment. When the yeses and nos are the right ones, you can feel it.

Does that make any sense?

Another ramble of thoughts.

Well, off to the races (literally) to watch my BIL race his car today. It's a mini-family gathering and that'll be nice. 

Hope you have a good Saturday. Later gators. 

33 Years

{Still talking about my calendar hah!}

Lots and lots and lots of balls in the air. 

I'm editing here and there. 

And making some wrong calls. 

Adding things.

Adding some wrong things. 

Adding some good things. 

It's a learning curve for me. I'm trying to word this as FULL and not TOO MUCH. Words matter.

The problem is the things I added, expanded. 

Going to my BIL's car race tomorrow for the entire day. Found out we need to bring food. I don't have picnic, cooler food. We're bringing guests. Guess what I need to do in the little hour I have free this afternoon? 

Volunteering for a couple of hours this morning has turned into all day. Happy to help and it's not problem, just unexpected.

Things like this. 

But if I think of it as an intentional week that I built with things that matter to me -- I'm doing a fantastic job. This week is really my FS visualization in real life. Even typing this lifts me from overwhelm to excitement. 

More of this, please. 

Oh, happy anniversary to me and hubs. 33 years. 

Spending the day volunteering together. Tonight is dinner out with friends.

Good day.

Good people. 

Good life. 

I can't forget to think about THIS. 

I leave you with a bedtime picture from last night. Me and Duke -- cuddle bugs. We were both tired in a good way. Later gators.

Calendar Woes

Yep, a bit too much.

And, it's all good.

But, it's a lot.

Maybe my calendar is meant to be a cycle. Too much ... swing back ... too little ... swing again.

I don't know, but you're probably sick of hearing about it AND can probably predict exactly these complaints.

Sorry. Anyway ...

Yesterday was a very easy hike. The intention was a catch up with a friend and enjoying nature. Check and check.

Then to the new nail salon. Experience was good -- I'll add it to the list.

This came on the radio driving over.

What?!?

Timely.

"Stoned at the Nail Salon"

Today is a rushed day. The schedule is tight - circumstances that aren't all my doing.

I scheduled the calendar, but other things are slipping into the spaces between. 

For example:

My RX refill was delayed and I'm almost out (can't order ahead because of insurance). I'll be near the compounding pharmacy for a volunteer meeting, but I have a second meeting and a lunch too. Can I squeeze it in to avoid a 45 minute drive this afternoon?

Things like this. Lots of little details clogging up space too. Follow ups when I shouldn't need to follow up, etc. If these extras didn't pollute the schedule, no problem. 

On a more lively note, I started thinking about the end-of-year stuff. 

Specifically my phrase of the year. 

This year is The Little Blue House (reminder of my FS visualization).

I asked Chat ... explained my focus for 2026 and gave some words:

Connection

Goals

Colorful

Neighborly

Community.

Together we imagine more.

Imagine more, together.

Color outside the lines.

Dreams welcomed, glitter required.

Dream big. Bring glitter.

It's a start. It was fun to "chat" with Chat over it. I'll do it again. Gets the ideas flowing.

I need to get to a workout. Out the door early for traffic and the first meeting. Have a good day. Later gators.