Hello, Monday and Worry

Hello, Monday. 

I enjoy a Monday.

I especially enjoy a solo Monday. 

That said, I'm in a bit of an anxiety mood. Woke up several times last night in panic about EVERYTHING and essentially, NOTHING. That feeling is lingering this morning, although it's starting to dissipate as I calm myself down.

Hormones?? Maybe. Probably. Hopefully. 

I have a couple of fussy (and I mean very, very small, not a big deal) things that are lingering on my to-do list. I feel stupid saying them, but they are giving me all the anxiety feels.

1. Returning a pricey hiking bag to REI because I took off the tags and have no receipt. It should be fine -- I'm a member and that looks like it's in policy, but I'm worried about it.

2. No response from the farm on the tomatoes I ordered for this week. My entire summer supper is tomato based and if I can't get tomatoes from them, where do I can farm fresh ones?? Do I need to change (and complicate) the menu for Friday?

3. The hormone patch is out of stock everywhere and I can't seem to figure it out. I have to go to the pharmacy in-person today because the automated system is shit. I still don't know if I'll get an answer. I've been working on this for 2 weeks now.

4. Peach jam canning is a bigger endeavor than I realized -- lots of supplies. Not a big deal, but something to add to my increasingly full schedule. 

Then a pile-up of things-to-do that suddenly feel like a lot. 

Also, every night add worry about the possible hiking trip next year. There are two HUGE hurdles before it's even a possibility and yet I worry all the time about whether I can travel un-pampered. Ridiculous, honestly I see it too.

Got a new pillow for neck support and it helped -- so that brought on the "how can I travel without it and hike all week" mind drama. 

I'm going to work on a few of these today and hopefully that'll ease the worry. 

How's the summer of unbothered an ease going, you ask?!?! Hah!

Yesterday was such a good day. Fun brunch with the kids. 

Chatted with the DILs and now we're going to Hamilton in September. I'm so excited. Also, WORRY because I purchased from a resale dealer. Everything should be fine and looks legit (big name dealer), but scams are so smart these days. So I unlocked a worry about the tickets for the next month. Geez. Three tickets were a lot of money. 

Planning an outdoor run today because they're paving my running route soon. Signs up, but no date, but I'm expecting it to start this week. I'm worried about running under all the trees since we're in spider season. See -- EVERYTHING about NOTHING. I want to go today and go at first light incase the paving starts. On a Monday, early, means no foot traffic to clear the webs for me. EEEEEEKKKKK!!!

Are you sick of hearing my thoughts today? Me too. 

Maybe after a productive day of problem solving, I can relax. 

Have a good Monday and start to the week. 

Do better than I'm doing! Later gators.

Decent Choices

Good decisions. Well done, me.

I'm glad I decided to not just HOPE for something that I have total control over hah!

I did the things.

Farmer's Market with Duke.

Gardened for a couple of hours.

Peloton ride. 

Then so many itty bitty chores that went by the wayside this week. Small -- like restocking my vitamins small, but they add up. I have a bit bigger things to do this week (and some pesky things), but I'm happy with the progress. 

From the garden yesterday. Butterflies everywhere. 

My neighbor and I exchanged goods again -- cucumbers and basil for chicken eggs. I enjoy this neighborly exchange. 

While I was gardening several people walked by and commented on the garden, the inclusion sign, and the rock snake. (The other rock snake at the park has been destroyed again, why??) Love neighbors with kindness. Also, glad I put the rock snake my friends painted on my property. 

This area feels like a community, a neighborhood and we're very lucky to be here.

I found a temporary place for the painting. It's not "hang" worthy, but I need to keep it around. My friend is proud of the paintings and will absolutely want to see mine again when she comes over. I enjoyed the class, but the painting is just okay -- I'd changed some things up if I painted it again.

Martha Beck talks about that with her paintings (she's a true artist). She'll paint the painting multiple times to get it right. She can't see the problem until it's on the canvas and then it's too late to correct, so she does it again.

The oddness of the picture
fits the oddness of the placement hah!

I watched the first episode of the new Ted Lasso. It's okay, not great. I hope it'll find its form as the season continues. 

Brunch with the family late morning. Long walk with Duke first. Then NOTHING again. The week starts off slowly and builds. Sort of a balance, but it won't feel like it as the week goes on. I need to use the quiet time for FS me.

I have no plans this afternoon and, once again, need to stave off the Snacking Sofa Slug desire. I won't begrudge myself TV time, but SSS is different. I know the difference -- as much as my mind likes to act all innocent when it's convincing me otherwise. Man, I wish the weather was cooler. Afternoons are indoor time right now and that's a bummer. The SSS is that much more noisy hah!

That's an issue for later though. I have a fun morning and early afternoon ahead. 

Hope you're having a good weekend. Later gators.

Cartoon Painting

Oh my gosh -- I was up until 11:30 last night. 

I feel jet lagged.

Or hungover. 

I'm going to be fighting the good fight today. It'll be VERY tempting to do nothing all afternoon and watch TV and SNACK. 

Hubby leaves in a couple of hours. I'm walking Duke and stopping at the Farmer's Market for tomatoes and peaches. Garden cleanup when I get home. Maybe (maybe not) a Peloton ride?!?! I slept in a little this morning so missed that window to workout before outside things. 

I'm too foggy to figure out a plan yet, but I really hope to report back tomorrow that I made a different choice. Maybe that choice will include a bonafide nap. Maybe a balance workout and meditation instead of a cardio workout (still no lifting per PT).

Anyway, the painting class was a lot of fun. I wouldn't call it Picasso, more a cartoon version with exaggerated everything (so my practice didn't help lol). The class painted together while watching the instructor paint too. Very well organized and attentive staff. You didn't need to practice since they walked you through the process step-by-step. The class was almost 3 hours long. Only critique -- the brushes were worn and hard to get detail work with clean lines. Maybe I had a bad batch.

What I'm SUPER happy about is this weekend is VERY open and MOSTLY solo. A few things this morning. Brunch with the family tomorrow and otherwise NOTHING. I need time to regroup and organize. It was a rushed week and my little home world feels like a mess. My mind feels like a jumble too. I have time to iron out all the things. 

My closet dressers are set for delivery next week. Yea to a closet reorg!!!!! It's probably a few day event because of my neck -- can't overdue the leaning over, looking down. Praise be -- I CANNOT wait to have it all setup. I want to think through and plan a general layout over the weekend.

My bed is calling me back in the worst way. Funny enough, I wasn't tired during the class, but it's hitting this morning. I'm such an old lady (and always have been). Today's plan SHOULD include an early night. That's the fear of a nap -- will it start me on a cycle of late nights?? Can I function well without one?? Don't want to zombie through the day.

And the irony, I'm too tired to figure it out lol. 

Hope you have a good one. Hope I make good choices. Lots of "hope" happening. See you tomorrow for the lowdown. Later gators. 

Mushrooms and Spiders

The area behind my neck -- where I have a hump is so sore to the touch. It's strange. No issue when I move my head, but feels like a massive bruise. PT said this should help the hump go away. I'll take this as a sign it's working. I'm religiously doing the exercise. 

The hike was fine on my neck, but I had to cut it short because of thunderstorms. I loaded the waist bag and hated the way it felt -- just asking for a lower back problem. I switched to a full hiking backpack with a waist and chest strap. That worked well. End of an era with my old blue pack. I'll return the other bag. 

Hiked with my mushroom friend. 

Mushrooms out in force AND the spiders are back for the season. Holy hell. It was awful. We looked like a couple of nuts the way we had to maneuver around them (I almost fell backwards on my bum). 

Once more people hit the trails, it was better. Early bird gets the webs this time of year. Webs are huge, spiders are moderate, but will grow massive as the season continues -- size of the palm of a hand. The spiders aren't particularly scary YET, but their webs are so dang thick like sticky strings. AWFUL!!! (and invasive). They can rebuild an entire web in 30 minutes. 

This is also the friend who invited me to pick, make, can peach jam with her mom using an old family recipe. We have the dates set for 2 weeks from now. Again, can't tell you how excited I am about it. I love, love, love this invitation! It'll take up most of the week, and I gladly held the calendar open.

Sign waving was fantastic again. Standing Thursday evening permit to gather. Supporting our neighbors who desperately need the support. The waves, horns, smiles -- it's the very LEAST we can do. It feels good to be in community. 

I have a fun evening with a friend at a Picasso Portrait class tonight. She belongs to a study on mental health and the arts. Every month she gets 2 free tickets to a choice an art event. She asked me to go this time. It's in the city (dang, traffic), but we'll go early and get dinner. I'm really looking forward to it, but not to the late evening. Brushing off my big girl panties and going out on a Friday night lol. Plus driving in traffic with storms -- not great for my neck, but I'm not missing this opportunity or asking her to drive. 

Full morning to get ready for my regular Friday coffee meeting. Hope you have a good one. Ready yourself for my art reveal tomorrow hahahaha!! Later gators.

Traffic and Construction (!!)

Yesterday's theme was driving in traffic and construction. I have no idea why so, so, so many road construction projects began the first week of school. It was a cluster-f*&k. I haven't had a driving day like that in a long time. 

PT is THE answer. Like my back, a simple exercise done every hour will get my neck back into place to release the nerve strain. There's no shoulder involvement, it all stems from my neck. Bicep reaction is expected given the nerve involvement and isn't a concern (it was protective). This should correct my neck hump too. I have decent range of motion except for back to front in my neck where I only have 10% of normal. Geez. 

No chiropractor on the neck. 

Ice twice a day, no heat.

Massage is okay, with some neck restrictions, for now.

Pilates is an option in about 6 weeks. 

Hiking with a backpack is also okay, but try for better neck position. 

More pain before better.

I feel recovery is in site now and I'm traveling the correct road now. Phew. 

Lunch was nice, but way, way too far to travel (oh the traffic and construction stops along the way). Our friend was a no-show and a no-text. Left us hanging. We both commented we understood and are happy she's taking care of herself, but it was noted and we'll do it differently next time. A rather complete blow-off for another social choice felt a step too far (and back to something she does a bit too often).

The home garden donation program for the food bank is awesome. We're a roll out, experimental group for the full launch next year. It was born from a community meeting lead by the farm. How can we help a community in need AND be prepared if things get worse. How can we be good neighbors? Community leaders, charity leaders, and the MASSIVE churches in the area were invited. 

Guess who's doing NOTHING??? Yep, the massive churches. They have land, resources, money, etc and said they couldn't help. Everyone else is stepping up with resources and aid. Guess they're too busy counting their money. 

Guess who does have community gardens, etc that feed people in need? Small, minority run churches. Of course. Did we expect otherwise?

More on this as it begins in September. 

I'm hiking for the first time in quite a bit this morning. Half with a friend, half solo (unless my neck needs to shorten the solo bit). I have the waist bag packed, but I might switch to a lighter backpack. I don't want to screw up my balance or hips. I'm on the fence. 

Then ...

Dentist appointment.

Maybe grandson pickup (no holding him on my left side).

Sign waving (might just lean the sign against my body so my neck is relaxed.)

These next 2 days are full with days that run into the evening and full of things-that-bother my neck. Ugh. I'll be as careful and deliberate as I can and do more and more of the neck exercises. She says I can't do too many. By the end of the afternoon, my neck needs a break, but not today or tomorrow. I'll be more careful scheduling for the next couple of weeks. 

What will aggravate my neck the most? All positional, especially looking down.

Reading.

Computer (I have my laptop propped on pillows on my lap).

Phone.

Hiking.

Painting at my desk.

Journaling at my desk.

Cooking.

Peloton position. 

Meditation position.

Sleeping position.

Pretty much my entire life hah. 

She said the challenge is settling the inflammation down while continuing with life activities. 

Okay, have to run. Early hike with a drive, but worth it (hopefully not insane traffic with school back). I love this trail. Beautiful, well groomed, lots of loops so lots of distance options. Sadly, miserably humid morning STILL. Guess it is August in GA.

Have a good day. Later gators.

IMAX 70mm

The movie and IMAX 70 experience was fantastic. 

Maybe because it's been a long minute since I've been to a movie theater?

Maybe because it was a matinee?

I don't know, but I loved both. 

Hubby didn't love the movie or the IMAX -- enjoyed it, didn't love it.

It surprised me how much I did.

You could feel the vibrations all around from the sound system. It was so immersive. Hubby thought the theater was too light, but it wasn't from ambient lighting, it was because the screen was enormous. 

Lots of action and violence, but many tender parts too. And, I cried at the one part -- no spoilers, but it was beautiful scene with an animal. 

I have PT today. My shoulder feels really good this morning. That said, I'm not doing my normal workouts, etc so not sure if things will go right back when I get back at it. I'm most curious about today and hope to get the go-ahead to start pilates. 

I have a lunch "outing" with a friend, maybe friends. We planned this day for our friend who lost her husband. Her idea, etc. She might be backing out for another social option. Now, I want to give her all the grace she needs and this is a time when she should do what's best for her ... but ... this is very typical of her. Other plans means she bails and doesn't bail until plans are being confirmed/reminded the day before. 

No way either of us would go to this trouble to meet at this place, on this day, etc. Since she's a "maybe" we're still going. It'll be nice and such, but geez. As often, I complain she needs to be proactive about canceling. This is why you don't make plans with her more than a couple days ahead. It's noted for next time.

I'm still engaging with her, etc. but moving back toward my quiet boundary about making plans with her. Of course, I'll be available for favors, etc, but a more specific available for social stuff. She's another someone I only make plans that I don't mind if she cancels or changes to a last minute maybe (i.e. something I'd happily do anyway or either way). Today was not that. 

BTW, I understand. I really think she needs to think most about herself right now and what that is changes day to day. But, she's done this for the 13 years we've been friends and that's why I know I need to go back to my unspoken boundaries. 

I'll round out the evening at a garden meeting to set up for donations to a local food bank. I'm slightly on the fence about whether I qualify with enough to donate (especially for a fall garden). It's at no cost to them or me, so I expect I'll give it a go and see if it makes sense to continue for next year's summer garden when I know I'll have donations. 

Speaking of the garden, it's almost time to pull most of it. I've pulled a couple of things -- cucumbers, early beans, tomato plant. Time for more to go. I have a second planting of some things growing (beans, cucumbers), but I need room for the fall plants in the next couple of weeks. 

Hubby leaves on Saturday for 8 day golf trip (staying at a friend's house) so I have a lot of solo time coming up. That's when I like to get into the gardening projects. 

Have a good day. I hope I'll have good PT news to report. Later gators.

Another No-Hike Tuesday

Chiropractor was better than I expected. He says lots of "out of alignment" causing the issue. Give it 2 days and it'll be okay. We'll see. I have PT on Wednesday so I think I'll get that evaluation before I try to do a bicep curl. It feels better than it has this morning though, so maybe ...

Spent the afternoon babysitting my grandson -- so fun. He started his new classroom yesterday and it was a hard day for him (lots of tears). He was so happy to be picked up. Transitions are hard for him for a couple of days. Sweet boy.  

I got bit by a bug of some sort on my back. Huge reaction -- swelling, stinging, welts all down my back. It STILL bothers me this morning. Almost like a stinger is still in the bite, but I can't reach it. Hubby tried to help, but big, thick fingers did nothing lol. It's always SOMETHING. Good lord. 

Speaking of bugs -- these appeared to be doing some sort of nasty on my window. It was quite a show.

Once again, I'm not hiking with the Tuesday group. It's faded into the background. I'm not ready to drop it entirely, but it's coming close to it. I still want to hold some connections to these women and the text thread is the best way. I was planning to hike next week, and plans came up (a favor for the kids). Might be able to go to lunch though. I don't purposely make plans on a Tuesday, but I never hold the day anymore. I told the group I could hike next week -- often "that" person decides to do an off week when I announce it. Curious if that'll hold true. I won't update until she announces plans for the day.

Matinee at the IMAX 70 for The Odyssey this morning (best day for the better seats). We're lucky enough to live about 45 minutes from one of the few theaters in the US. Won't miss this opportunity. I'm very excited about the theater experience, but not sure about the actual movie. VERY happy about the morning viewing though. Daytime vs nighttime is never a contest for me. 

This is EVERYTHING on my calendar today. Easy peasy. No chores, nothing at all. Of course the entire event will be about 5 hours with drive time, etc. so it's most of the day. I should have some late afternoon time to putz around. Creative stuff?? 

That's all from here this morning. I hope your week is going well. Later gators.